Accept your finite capacity, as this is the key to living a calmer, more meaningful life.
Realize that not being able to do everything is an inescapable part of being human, not a personal failing, which can be liberating.
Relinquish the struggle to do everything and instead direct your limited time and attention towards the few things that genuinely matter to you.
Do not postpone living intentionally until your life feels perfectly calm or controlled, as that moment may never arrive.
Instead of striving for your ideal life in the future, find ways to embody and claim that way of being in the present moment.
Decide who you want to be and then immediately start acting from that identity in the present, rather than striving to become that person in the future.
Understand that every decision has downsides, and accepting this reality can liberate you from indecision and regret.
When making decisions, understand you are choosing which set of inevitable downsides you are willing to accept, rather than searching for a choice without any negative consequences.
Apply the ‘reverse golden rule’ by ensuring you don’t treat yourself worse than you would treat anyone else, fostering self-compassion.
Cease resisting the inevitable realities of life, as resistance is often the source of stress and suffering.
Strive to be fully present and ‘here’ for your life, as this deep engagement unifies all meaningful long-term goals and leads to a sense of being truly alive.
Be cautious of constantly optimizing your life, as this can inadvertently remove the very things that make life meaningful and worth living.
Recognize the tension between a smooth, easy life and a life you will value most in hindsight, and intentionally choose the latter.
Seek both peace of mind and productive ambition, operating from a place of ‘I am enough’ to express yourself through creativity and work, rather than striving to feel sufficient.
Recognize that internal conflict, stemming from not acting as the person you want to be, often drives unhealthy downstream behaviors.
Separate your self-worth from your achievements, recognizing that you don’t need to earn your right to exist through constant perfection or accomplishment.
Challenge the concept of ’non-negotiables,’ recognizing that almost everything is negotiable and subject to change based on circumstances.
Recognize that inaction often stems from fear of not achieving a perfect result or overestimating difficulties, which blocks natural action.
When facing a task, ask ‘What if this were easy?’ to challenge assumptions that effort must be high, potentially revealing simpler, more enjoyable paths.
Instead of rigidly adhering to schedules, ask yourself ‘What do I feel like doing right now?’ from your tasks, as this self-compassionate approach often leads to accomplishing what’s needed.
Instead of committing to long-term habits, ask if you’re willing to do a desired activity just once today, to overcome the mental barrier of it being a ’long-term project.’
Implement habits with a ‘daily-ish’ approach (e.g., 5-6 days a week, or 4 in busy times) to maintain flexibility and self-compassion, avoiding self-criticism if you miss a day.
Develop rules and habits that genuinely serve your life goals, rather than becoming a slave to rigid rules for their own sake.
Envision your desired legacy on your deathbed, then create and commit to 3-5 weekly ‘happiness habits’ that ensure you achieve those long-term goals.
Instead of trying to account for every minute, identify a few key actions each week that express your long-term goals.
Use goals as a compass for direction and behavior, but hold them loosely, as achieving them doesn’t guarantee lasting happiness.
Move beyond doing things solely for future goals or external rewards; strive to engage in activities simply because you enjoy them in the present.
Make choices intentionally, understanding that smoothness or ease is not always the ultimate goal, and sometimes effort in valued areas is preferable.
Strive to make conscious choices and be aware of your limitations, as this conscious engagement is more powerful than acting unconsciously.
Understand that most stress is internally generated by your perception of situations, and actively reframing your view can significantly reduce it.
Question whether an ‘interruption’ is truly a problem, or if it’s only problematic because of rigid expectations you’ve placed on your time, especially if it’s a moment of connection.
When needing to return to work after an interruption, pause, make eye contact, acknowledge the other person, and then kindly state you’ll talk later, ensuring everyone feels seen.
Avoid the ironic situation where your desire to achieve ‘good’ goals leads to negative behavior; ensure your daily actions align with the pro-social values you aim to manifest.
Change your behaviors more effortlessly by embodying the person you want to be, rather than trying to force behaviors that conflict with your current self-perception.
When a generous impulse arises, act on it immediately (e.g., send the email, make the donation), rather than postponing it or overthinking.
Don’t wait for perfect conditions or equipment; if you have an urge to do something positive, act on it immediately.
Apply mindfulness to choose which impulses to act on, allowing you to follow positive urges and refrain from actions you might later regret.
Cultivate a default of saying ‘yes’ to opportunities for connection and meaningful experiences, especially with loved ones, remembering the preciousness of time.
Embrace the understanding that ’later is always too late’ for the things that truly matter, prompting action in the present.
Prioritize genuine connection over perfect presentation when hosting or engaging with others, accepting imperfections in your home or self.
Present yourself and your life in an unvarnished way, including flaws and imperfections, as this fosters deeper connection with others.
Stop trying to change who you are to please others, as this often creates distance and is ultimately ineffective.
Openly share your insecurities, failures, and flaws, as this vulnerability fosters deeper connection and empowers others.
Question the concept of ‘wasting time’ and instead view such experiences as powerful learning opportunities.
Understand that regret, in the sense of waving goodbye to infinite possibilities, is an inescapable part of life, which can be liberating.
Recognize that regret often stems from perfectionism and the belief in a perfect decision, and releasing it can free you from past traps.
Begin by accepting the fundamental truth of your limitations, including not just finite time but also limited control over how time unfolds and your knowledge of the future.
Actively practice letting go and getting out of your own way, allowing things to happen more naturally to bring greater meaning and creativity into your life.
Engage in mental reflection and self-care in the midst of your busy life, rather than waiting for an ideal, calm future moment.
Pay attention to what information or advice naturally resonates with you, as that indicates it’s timely and relevant, and avoid forcing yourself to adopt things that don’t.
Process external information through your own filter, experimenting to see what truly works for you, rather than blindly following advice.
Recognize that small, everyday actions like helping a few people or cooking a meal are meaningful and sufficient for a good life, rather than striving for world-changing impact.
Do not feel obligated to do everything that seems important or that others want you to do, as your finite capacity means you must prioritize.
Trust that choices made honestly and in touch with yourself will lead to meaningful actions, without needing to constantly pressure yourself for perfect or extraordinary outcomes.
Understand that giving up some things to focus on others is often temporary (‘for now’), allowing you to revisit them in a different season of life.
Engage in activities you desire now, rather than postponing them until a future goal is met, as this can lead to desired outcomes as a secondary effect.
View your daily actions as an expression of the life you want to live, focusing on enjoying the present rather than waiting for future perfection.
Recognize that attempting to do everything will lead to anxiety and overwhelm, and that this is an unwinnable battle.
Recognize and embrace that your time is limited, as this acceptance can lead to feeling more alive and connected.
Recognize your limitations to effectively focus your life on the most meaningful ambitions you are truly capable of achieving.
Understand that sometimes the burden of trying to ‘do it all’ becomes so heavy that the only path to relief is to simply put it down and stop trying.
Relax into the reality of your limitations, and from that acceptance, identify one small, good way to spend the next 20 minutes of your life.
Each morning, reflect and write down a quality you wish to showcase to the world that day to increase the likelihood of manifesting it.
In the evening, reflect on what went well and what you can do differently tomorrow, acknowledging imperfections and setting renewed intentions for the next day.
View caring for family as an inherent and non-negotiable part of a meaningful life, rather than an additional task to squeeze into a busy schedule.
Do not postpone enjoyment, as life doesn’t always require constant struggle; question if tasks could be approached with more ease.