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How To Reconnect With Your True Self & Live With Purpose with Kirsty Gallagher #565

Jun 17, 2025 2h 98 insights
Many of us are so busy keeping up with life, that we forget to check in with ourselves. We follow the rules, meet expectations and strive for success – yet still feel disconnected, stuck or unfulfilled. True purpose can feel elusive, like something we’re always searching for but never quite finding.   This week, I’m joined by Kirsty Gallagher to explore how reconnecting with who you truly are can lead to a life of greater meaning, alignment, and joy. Kirsty is a renowned meditation and yoga teacher, a spiritual coach, and Sunday Times bestselling author of several books - including her latest, Your Cosmic Purpose.   In our conversation, we discuss: Why your true purpose is to be yourself, not to chase status, success or approval How to start listening to your own truth, even if you’ve spent a lifetime tuning in to everyone else’s Why spending time in stillness is so important The role of discomfort and “internal conflict” as signs you’re out of alignment Why trusting the timing of your life is essential and how your most painful experiences may be guiding you to greater clarity and purpose The importance of celebrating your progress How to reclaim your power by learning to make conscious, intentional choices - even when you are unable to change your external circumstances Throughout this conversation, Kirsty shares stories from her own journey, from corporate burnout to spiritual awakening, and offers practical tools to help you reconnect with the part of you that already knows the way.    This conversation may feel a little different from others I have had on this podcast. It leans more into the emotional and spiritual aspects of health and healing, but if you listen with an open heart and mind, I truly believe there is something in it for everyone.    At its core, it’s a powerful reminder that you are the expert of your own life. Your truth matters. Your voice matters. And your purpose, however small or quiet it may seem right now, is already within you. Support the podcast and enjoy Ad-Free episodes. Try FREE for 7 days on Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/feelbetterlivemore. For other podcast platforms go to https://fblm.supercast.com.   Thanks to our
Actionable Insights

1. Recognize Self as Expert

Acknowledge and trust that you are the ultimate expert of your own life, as no one else has your unique lived experience or internal wisdom.

2. Embrace Your True Self

Your true purpose is to be authentically yourself, not to chase external validation, status, or success, as these external factors are not who you truly are.

3. Cultivate Deep Inner Truth

Strive to cultivate a deep inner truth and conviction that is independent of external understanding or agreement, knowing that your personal truth is what truly matters for you.

4. Reclaim Personal Power

Focus on finding your own power, truth, and purpose, rather than relying on others to tell you what to do, to avoid stripping yourself of your own agency.

5. Practice Solitude Regularly

Regularly practice solitude to shut down external noise and listen to your inner voice, as this is a crucial practice for health, happiness, and living from the inside out.

6. Invest in Self-Knowledge

Dedicate time to yourself to get to know who you truly are, as this self-knowledge is fundamental to establishing and living your own truth.

7. Feel All Emotions for Intuition

To listen to your intuition, first allow yourself to fully feel all your emotions, including those you’ve avoided, as intuition resides beneath them and cannot be selectively accessed.

8. Acknowledge Inconvenient Truths

Recognize that your intuition often speaks inconvenient truths about situations like jobs or relationships; acknowledge these truths even if they scare you, as you already know what needs to be done.

9. Resolve Indecision Promptly

Recognize that indecision is disempowering; you likely already know what to do, but fear is holding you back, so confront that fear to move forward.

10. Make Conscious Choices

If you’re in a situation you dislike, consciously choose to be there for now, and then begin to analyze why it feels out of alignment to understand what needs to change.

11. Adopt a Spiritual Approach to Life

Integrate spirituality as a way of life, approaching all experiences, even difficult ones, with devotion, meaning, and purpose, asking ‘What can I learn from this?’ rather than feeling like a victim.

12. Choose Empowering Beliefs

Recognize that your perspective on life’s events is a choice; consciously choose empowering and helpful beliefs, such as ’everything is happening for me,’ to foster growth.

13. Commit to Consistent Daily Practice

Commit to a consistent daily practice, even for a short duration like six minutes, and trust that over time, your life will transform in unimaginable ways.

14. Start Small with Self-Time

Begin your self-care journey by committing to just five to ten minutes for yourself each day, starting small and consistently, as even this brief time is crucial for well-being.

15. Prioritize Showing Up Consistently

Focus on the consistency of showing up for your chosen practice, even if it’s just for a few minutes, as the act of showing up is more important than the duration or intensity.

16. Build Self-Trust Through Small Acts

Consistently carving out time for yourself, even in small ways, builds self-trust, which then empowers you to act on bigger ’niggles’ like quitting a job, pursuing brave endeavors, or having difficult conversations.

17. Daily Heart-Centered Check-in

Start each day by placing your hands over your heart, tuning in, and asking yourself, ‘What do I need today?’ to reconnect with your inner self.

18. Pause and Feel Decisions

Before making a snap decision, pause and feel into how a choice or situation truly resonates with you, rather than relying solely on logic.

19. Guide Choices by Feelings

When faced with choices, imagine each option and assess how it feels, then lean towards what feels purposeful, meaningful, and joyful.

20. Daily Curious Self-Reflection

At the end of each day, replay your actions and reactions with curiosity, asking ‘why’ without judgment, to uncover conditioning and behaviors out of alignment with your truth.

21. Validate Your Emotions

Avoid invalidating your own emotions by questioning or comparing them; simply acknowledge and accept how you feel without judgment or seeking external justification.

22. Feel Emotions Without Narrative

When an emotion arises, simply acknowledge and feel it (e.g., ‘I feel sad’) without immediately needing to create a story about its origin or justification.

23. Express Emotions Through Movement

Explore expressing emotions by asking what they would say or how they would move, then allowing that expression through your body to access deeper wisdom.

24. Heed Discontent as a Call

View feelings of discontent or being in the wrong place as your soul’s call to move forward and evolve into a newer version of yourself.

25. Envision Ideal Future Role

After identifying what you dislike about your current situation, flip your perspective to envision what your ideal role or job would be, as this indicates your soul’s calling.

26. Use Current Job for Self-Learning

View your current job, even if you dislike it, as ‘soul school’ – an opportunity to learn about yourself, identify what triggers you, and explore your inner workings.

27. Pursue Long-Term Goals with Small Steps

Don’t abandon long-term dreams; instead, identify what small, actionable steps you can take now to move towards them, even within your current constraints.

28. Take Practical Steps Towards Dreams

If aspiring to a new career, like a nutritional therapist, start by reading books, applying principles to your own life, and offering help to friends (with permission) to build experience and confidence.

29. Find Daily Mini-Purposes

Integrate small activities into your daily life, even if only for five minutes, that make you feel purposeful and meaningful, allowing purpose to exist outside of your job.

30. Reframe Challenges as Growth

Reframe all experiences, especially difficult ones, as opportunities to ‘grow through’ them, helping you evolve into the person capable of fulfilling your purpose.

31. Practice Self-Reassurance

In moments of fear or difficulty, practice self-reassurance by making promises to yourself, reminding yourself that you are there for yourself and will navigate the challenge.

32. Cultivate Self-Trust and Love

Actively cultivate self-trust, self-belief, self-care, and fierce self-love, especially during challenging times, as these are foundational for navigating life’s uncertainties.

33. Choose to Trust Life’s Timing

Consciously choose to believe that everything happening in your life, including delays or challenges, is occurring at the right time to help you get to where you need to be.

34. Trust Personal Lived Experience

Trust your own lived experience as a guide, recognizing that personal truths are deeply understood through direct experience, not just intellectual knowledge.

35. Adopt Helpful Beliefs

Consciously choose to adopt beliefs, such as ’everything is happening as it should,’ that are empowering and helpful for your well-being, rather than those that lead to frustration.

36. Balance Logic with Intuition

Counter societal conditioning that prioritizes only logical and scientific explanations by also valuing and listening to your body’s wisdom and intuition.

37. Cultivate Sense of Awe

Allow yourself to cultivate a sense of awe and wonder for aspects of life that cannot be logically explained, embracing the mystery and beauty of existence.

38. Choose Wonder Over Pure Logic

Consciously choose to embrace a sense of awe and wonder about being alive, rather than insisting on a purely rational, logical, and scientific explanation for everything.

39. Challenge Glorification of Busyness

Question and challenge the societal glorification of busyness, recognizing it as an ’epidemic’ that prevents presence and connection.

40. Incorporate Rituals into Life

Shift from merely having routines to incorporating meaningful rituals into your daily life, to bring more presence and connection to your actions.

41. Use Nature for Presence

Engage with nature, such as watching sunrises or sunsets, as a practice to bring yourself into the present moment and cultivate mindfulness.

42. Spend Time in Nature

Make a conscious effort to carve out moments to spend time in nature, as it helps you connect with a greater life force energy and remember what’s truly important.

43. Anticipate and Overcome Excuses

Be aware that your mind will generate numerous excuses (too busy, tired, etc.) to prevent you from engaging in self-reflection; anticipate these and commit to showing up anyway.

44. Set Realistic Expectations

Set realistic expectations for new practices to avoid failure and self-criticism; start with what is genuinely achievable for you, rather than aiming for an overwhelming amount.

45. Reframe “Should” to “Could”

Consciously change the word ‘should’ to ‘could’ in your internal dialogue to create a sense of option and choice, empowering yourself rather than feeling obligated.

46. Prioritize Self and Inner World

Intentionally prioritize yourself and your inner world by dedicating a few minutes each day to self-reflection and finding meaning, viewing it as a gift to yourself.

47. Practice Freestyle Journaling

Keep a pen and paper handy for freestyle journaling; if you don’t know what to write, start with ‘I don’t know what’s right’ and continue, allowing insights to emerge.

48. Practice Grounding in Nature

Engage in simple grounding practices like taking off your shoes, placing bare feet on the earth, taking five deep breaths, and feeling the sun on your face.

49. Commit to Self-Promises

Discover what self-care practices and timeframes work for you, then make a commitment to yourself to stick to them, as keeping promises to yourself builds self-trust.

50. Separate Purpose from Job

Understand that your job can be a means to earn money, and your true purpose can be found outside of your professional role, such as being a parent, doing charity work, or tending a garden.

51. Find Purpose in Daily Actions

Reframe your daily activities, including how you approach your job, navigate challenges, and show up each day, as opportunities to live out your purpose.

52. Cultivate Authentic Self

Strive to become your authentic self, as living in alignment with who you truly are is the path to a life filled with meaning and purpose.

53. Prioritize Genuine Interest

Serve others best by prioritizing what genuinely interests you and aligns with your authentic self, as this passion will resonate more deeply and effectively.

54. Filter Information Personally

When consuming information, take only what resonates with you as your truth and disregard the rest, rather than trying to adopt every piece of advice.

55. Access Inner Wisdom

Instead of seeking external teachers or trying to be convinced, focus on remembering and accessing the deep wisdom, knowing, and truth that already reside within you.

56. Lead by Embodied Example

Live as an embodied example of truth, authenticity, honesty, and trust in your own life, as this approach can inspire others without needing to convince them.

57. Live Authentically, Ignore Approval

Live as the embodiment of who you are and the life you desire, as your personal conviction will reduce the need for external validation or belief from others.

58. Discern Your Personal Truth

Understand that your truth is unique to you; acknowledge what works for others, but only adopt practices or beliefs that genuinely resonate and feel meaningful to you.

59. Daily Authenticity Check

Regularly ask yourself if you are being fully authentic to who you are, what you desire, and what you want to express, without filtering or censoring yourself.

60. Persevere with Practices

Understand that the benefits of spiritual or self-care practices may not be immediately obvious; their impact often becomes clear only when you stop doing them, so maintain consistency.

61. Practice Daily Self-Celebration

Regularly check in with yourself to acknowledge and celebrate what you did well each day, rather than focusing solely on perceived shortcomings.

62. Acknowledge Your Best Effort

After completing a task or effort, take a moment to acknowledge your performance, even if it’s just a simple ‘Well done, you tried your best, you showed up,’ to build self-trust.

63. Shift Focus to Achievements

Consciously shift your focus from what you perceive as wrong or negative to acknowledging and celebrating your achievements and positive actions.

64. Cultivate Self-Celebration

Make a conscious effort to celebrate your achievements and acknowledge your efforts more frequently, as humans tend to under-celebrate themselves.

65. Incorporate Emotion in Habits

Understand that emotion, particularly celebration, is more effective than mere repetition in creating lasting habits, so integrate positive feelings into your habit-forming process.

66. Consciously Choose Perspective

Recognize that your choices about how you perceive situations shape your reality and experience, so consciously choose to look for the positive.

67. Allow All Emotions

Give yourself permission to fully feel and honor deeper emotions like grief, loneliness, frustration, or anger, as these are powerful messengers for self-learning and growth.

68. Interpret Emotions as Guides

View all emotions as messengers that indicate whether you are in or out of alignment with your truth and authenticity, using them as guidance rather than labeling them as good or bad.

69. Focus on Process, Not Just Goals

Shift your focus from solely achieving external goals to appreciating and engaging with the process of getting there, as over-focusing on the outcome can lead to dissatisfaction.

70. Embrace Challenge for Growth

Recognize that challenges and uncertainty are essential for personal growth and evolution, helping you develop into the person capable of fulfilling your purpose.

71. Avoid Inauthentic Roles

Be aware of roles or situations that require you to be someone inauthentic to yourself, as this creates internal conflict and moves you away from your truth.

72. Practice Shavasana for Connection

Engage in practices like Shavasana at the end of yoga to connect with your infinite and expansive self, potentially experiencing moments of bliss and deep understanding.

73. Value Profound Experiences

Understand that rare, profound experiences of bliss or deep connection can make consistent, sometimes challenging, daily practices worthwhile and provide glimpses of deeper truth.

74. Detachment from Thoughts

Practice detaching from your thoughts and the stories you tell yourself about events, recognizing that internal narratives and judgments often cause more problems than the events themselves.

75. Meditate to Detach from Stories

Use meditation to learn to detach from the constant commentary of your thoughts and the stories you create, understanding that these are not always true representations of reality.

76. Explore Moving Meditation

Consider exploring moving meditation, such as yoga, as an alternative to seated meditation, especially if the latter feels too rigid or ‘masculine’ in its approach.

77. Regular Self-Check-ins

Make time for regular self-check-ins to ask ‘How am I feeling today?’ even if you fear the answers, as avoiding these internal truths prevents necessary change and growth.

78. Be Brave to Go Against Grain

Be brave enough to go against societal expectations or the opinions of others when pursuing a path that aligns with your true purpose, even if it seems ‘crazy’ to them.

79. Be Wary of Advice from the Stuck

Be cautious of advice from people who are themselves stuck or unhappy, as their recommendations may reflect their own fears rather than your best path.

80. Practice Radical Responsibility

Take radical responsibility for your own life, while also allowing others to take radical responsibility for theirs, understanding you are not responsible for their happiness or problems.

81. Accept Limits of Influence

Understand that you cannot fix, heal, rescue, or change anyone who does not want to be changed, regardless of your desire to help them.

82. Set Boundaries When Needed

Practice setting boundaries, prioritizing yourself, or loving someone from a distance when necessary, as part of taking radical responsibility for your own life.

83. Seek Internal Approval

Focus on cultivating internal self-approval rather than seeking external validation or permission from others to pursue your path.

84. Avoid External Blame

Avoid the disempowering trap of external blame and frustration when things don’t go as planned, as this mindset prevents personal growth and acceptance.

85. Reflect on Mortality

Use reflections on death and mortality as a powerful catalyst to understand what is truly important in life and to motivate living more authentically.

86. Live Fully in Honor of Others

If inspired by loss, make a commitment to live your life fully and pursue your dreams as a dedication to those who can no longer do so.

87. Overcome Procrastination with Urgency

Use the stark reality of mortality to overcome procrastination and ‘do it tomorrow’ mentality, recognizing the urgency of living your desired life now.

88. Seek Answers Beyond Norms

Actively seek answers and truths that lie beyond societal norms, driven by an inner purpose, to learn life’s lessons without necessarily needing extreme adversity.

89. Listen to Early Niggles

Pay attention to early feelings of discontent or ’niggles’ as your inner self trying to guide you, to avoid needing more extreme adversity to get your attention.

90. Avoid Comparing to Highlight Reels

Refrain from comparing your real life to the curated highlight reels of others, especially on social media, as this often leads to unrealistic expectations and dissatisfaction.

91. Speak Your Truth

Speak your truth authentically, understanding that your message will resonate with those who are meant to hear it, and it’s okay if it doesn’t resonate with everyone else.

92. Reconnect with Childhood Awe

Reconnect with the natural sense of awe and wonder you likely experienced as a child, recognizing the miraculous nature of existence, even if you are currently skeptical.

93. Cultivate Strong Sense of Purpose

Cultivate a strong sense of purpose in your life, as research indicates it correlates with greater happiness, better health, and a longer lifespan.

94. Seek Belief in Something Greater

If feeling lost, seek to connect with or believe in something greater than your individual existence, as this can provide meaning and combat feelings of despondency.

95. Resist External Validation

Be aware of and resist societal pressures that capitalize on feelings of inadequacy and constantly direct your attention outwards, seeking happiness or worth from external sources.

96. Cultivate Inner Happiness

Acquire material possessions if desired, but ensure they are not the sole purpose of your happiness; cultivate an inner happiness that would remain even if all external things were lost.

97. Practice Self-Acceptance

If self-love feels too challenging, start by simply liking yourself, being present with yourself, showing up for yourself, and doing your best each day, recognizing that this is enough.

98. Prioritize Lived Experience

Understand that the most profound truths and best things in life are not learned intellectually but must be experienced firsthand.