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How to Plan the Post-Lockdown Future of Your Dreams and Coping with Emotions with Dr Tara Swart #116

Jun 9, 2020 1h 27m 24 insights
For many people, lockdown has provided a time for personal development. You may have discovered and worked on new qualities or skills. But I’m very aware that just as many people have found it a really stressful and incredibly busy time. Perhaps you’re a key worker, or a working parent juggling schooling and office hours. Maybe you’re out of work, have lost loved ones, or are in any way struggling to cope. This week’s podcast has a really important message for everyone: be kind to yourself. It’s OK not to have acquired new skills or found enlightenment. I’m delighted to welcome back Dr Tara Swart, a previous guest, whose message I think is more important now than ever. Tara’s impressive list of credentials includes medical doctor, neuroscientist, psychiatrist, lecturer at MIT, business coach and author. Her passion is teaching people how to apply lessons from neuroscience and behavioural psychology – in easy, achievable ways – to enhance their everyday lives and better cope with stress and change. We discuss some really practical, empowering acts of self-care you can easily build into your day – micro habits that can build your resilience to stress. Not all of us have time for 90 minutes of yoga every evening. But Tara explains there is no need to worry - simply lying on your yoga mat for five minutes sends the signal to your brain that you matter and that you are worth looking after. We chat about the value of journaling during the pandemic; how it develops self-awareness and can help our relationships. We also talk about spirituality, vivid dreaming, and how to cope if you’re feeling anxious about the easing of lockdown or uncertain about the future. Finally, Tara talks us through how to create a ‘vision board’ for how we want life to be different after lockdown. Mine is going to include less time travelling, more with my family, whom I’ve come to cherish more than ever during these past months. What would be on your action board? What have you learned about yourself during lockdown – and how do you want that to inform the life you lead going forward? I really hope this conversation helps you to consider that. Show notes available via https://drchatterjee.com/116 Follow me on instagram.com/drchatterjee/ Follow me on facebook.com/DrChatterjee/ Follow me on twitter.com/drchatterjeeuk
Actionable Insights

1. Cultivate Self-Awareness through Journaling

Engage in journaling not just to download thoughts and emotions, but to read back over entries and chart your emotional journey or personal development. This helps make sense of things, surface anxieties, and understand your emotional state, especially during unexpected changes.

2. Understand Emotional Change Curves

Use psychological models like the Kubler-Ross grief/change curve to understand your emotional journey during unexpected changes, which typically moves through shock, denial, anger, depression, and then finding meaning and acceptance. Journaling can help surface where you and others in your household are on this curve to reduce tension.

3. Prioritize Solitude for Self-Understanding

Dedicate some degree of solitude in your day for reflection, whether through journaling or simply sitting quietly. This time is crucial for understanding your own body and mind, and subsequently, for understanding others.

4. Embrace Micro-Habits for Self-Care

Integrate small, consistent self-care actions into your daily routine, even if it’s just for five minutes. These “micro habits” signal to your brain that you prioritize yourself, building resilience to stress and fostering a sense of well-being.

5. Create Environmental Triggers for Habits

Place items that remind you of your desired habits in visible locations, such as a yoga mat in your bedroom or a kettlebell in your kitchen. This visual cue acts as a trigger, making you more likely to engage in the activity, even for a short duration.

6. Focus on Positive Intentions

Choose habits that you genuinely enjoy or find deeply meaningful, as a positive intention or desire increases the likelihood of adherence and the benefits received. Associate the action with self-care and self-love to enhance its impact on your brain and body.

7. Practice Head, Heart, Gut Alignment

To gain deeper insights and make aligned decisions, ask a question to your brain for a logical answer, then do deep breathing and ask your heart for an emotional answer, and finally, do deep breathing and ask your belly for an intuitive answer. This practice helps tap into different levels of self-awareness.

8. Be Kind, Manage Stress

Acknowledge that it’s okay not to have acquired new skills or found enlightenment during stressful times. Prioritize self-kindness and simple stress-reducing activities, like taking a bath with magnesium salts or drinking more water, to help your brain and body cope.

9. Prepare Self-Care Essentials

Proactively ensure you have the necessary items for your self-care routines, such as ordering magnesium salts before you run out. This simple act of preparation is a form of self-care that supports you on challenging days.

10. Do Self-Care First Morning

If self-care is important to you, make it the first thing you do in the morning. This helps ensure it gets done before daily distractions and responsibilities take over your time and energy.

11. Establish Daily Routines & Schedules

Create and adhere to a daily routine and schedule, even during periods of confinement or uncertainty. This structure, whether through mealtimes or dedicated activity slots, provides stability and helps maintain mental well-being.

12. Document Self-Learnings via Journaling

Use journaling to document new insights and learnings about yourself that emerge during significant life changes. This helps capture what has surfaced and what you’ve learned, informing how you want to live going forward.

13. Create Vision Board for Future

Develop a vision or “action board” using visual imagery to represent how you want your life to be different after a significant period of change, such as lockdown. This primes your brain to notice and grasp opportunities to make your desired future a reality.

14. Design Vision Boards for Subconscious

When creating a vision board, use visual imagery and metaphorical representations rather than words or numbers, as this resonates more strongly with your subconscious. Arrange images to reflect desired life balance, with more images for a full life and more space for a life with room to breathe.

15. Combine Activities with Loved Ones

Actively seek ways to combine your personal growth, work, or other activities with spending time with your children and partner. This approach allows for shared experiences and ensures that quality time with loved ones is integrated rather than seen as separate from other priorities.

16. Be Intentional with Life Choices

Approach your life with intentionality, recognizing that your choices shape your future. Maintain awareness and set clear intentions to actively choose how you want your life to fundamentally change, rather than passively returning to old patterns.

17. Manage Anxiety by Shifting Perspective

To cope with anxiety about future uncertainties, such as the easing of lockdown, set your mental “goalpost” further away (e.g., thinking about things returning to normal in several months). This reduces immediate anxiety and increases the likelihood of being pleasantly surprised if things improve sooner.

18. Use Visual Focus for Perspective

When feeling anxious or short-term focused, perform a visual exercise: spend one minute looking closely at a small object (e.g., your palm, a leaf), observing every detail. Then, spend another minute looking at a large object far in the distance (e.g., a big tree, a building). This helps shift your brain from anxious mode to a broader perspective.

19. Grant Permission for Extended Breaks

If you have the financial means and truly need a break, give yourself explicit permission to take an extended period off (e.g., several months) rather than constantly deferring the decision in short increments. This reduces ongoing stress and allows for genuine recuperation.

20. Embrace Unplanned Time Off Fully

If circumstances lead to an unplanned day off, embrace it fully rather than feeling frustrated about unfinished work. Give yourself permission to disconnect from emails and workload to genuinely rest and enjoy the time.

21. Reflect on Entrenched Neural Pathways

Use periods of change to explore entrenched neural pathways – long-standing habits, behaviors, and beliefs from childhood, family roles, and value systems. Understand how these might be helping or hindering you now, particularly regarding your personal boundaries.

22. Practice Body Gratitude

Engage in a “body gratitude” exercise by going from head to toe, either in the shower or while moisturizing, and thanking each part of your body for its functions and condition. This practice fosters a sense of well-being and appreciation for your physical self.

23. Supplement Daily Nutritional Needs

Consider taking a high-quality whole food supplement, like Athletic Greens, each morning as an “insurance policy” to ensure you meet your nutritional needs, especially if you struggle to consistently get all nutrients from real whole foods.

24. Support Oral Microbiome Health

To support immune health, consider using a toothpaste, like Zendium, that aims to increase good bacteria and reduce bad bacteria in your oral microbiome, which is an important part of your body’s natural defense system.