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How to Find Happiness, Peace & Purpose Even When Life Feels Hard with Mo Gawdat #596

Nov 19, 2025 1h 13m 23 insights
We all want to be happy. Yet the harder we chase it, the more elusive happiness it can seem. This week’s returning guest podcast believes the answer does not lie in changing our circumstances, but in changing how we see them. Mo Gawdat is the former Chief Business Officer of Google [X] and the author of multiple bestselling books, including Solve for Happy and That Little Voice in Your Head. Following the tragic death of his son Ali, Mo has made happiness his primary topic of research, diving deeply into literature and conversing on the topic with some of the wisest people in the world.   Mo actually came on my podcast to talk about relationships and how he believes technology and AI can help us transform them, but when we started chatting our conversation went off in a completely different direction. We ended up having a wonderfully deep and thought provoking conversation that ended up being almost 3 hours - so, I have decided to split up the conversation into 2 different episodes. This week’s episode is the first half of our conversation, and the second half will come out next week. In this week’s episode, Mo shares what he’s learned about happiness, suffering and the true nature of life and death. We explore what it really means to say that “happiness is a choice,” and why that perspective can coexist with deep compassion for pain and loss. During our conversation, we discuss: ●      Why happiness isn’t dependent on external circumstances – and how it’s possible to find peace even in difficult times. ●      How reframing our thoughts and expectations can shift our emotional experience of life. ●      What Mo learned about happiness growing up in Egypt, and how seeing suffering around him shaped his sense of gratitude. ●      The powerful lessons he drew from losing his son, Ali, and how grief can open a path to love and meaning. ●      Why suffering can be one of our greatest teachers, showing us what truly matters. ●      How our thoughts can keep pain alive – and why letting go of the mental replay of past events is an act of wisdom. ●      Mo’s belief that death is not the end, and how physics and spirituality can point to the same truth about consciousness. Mo helps us all to see that happiness isn’t fragile or fleeting; it’s a state of being we can nurture, even when life feels hard. His story is a testament to the strength of the human heart and our endless capacity to find meaning in love. I hope you enjoy listening.  Support the podcast and enjoy Ad-Free episodes. Try FREE for 7 days on Apple Podcasts https://apple.co/feelbetterlivemore. For other podcast platforms go to https://fblm.supercast.com.   Thanks to our
Actionable Insights

1. Forgive and Let Go

Holding onto a grudge only hurts you, like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. Forgive, accept life’s experiences, and enjoy moving on.

2. Choose to Be Happier

Happiness is a choice and a skill. Learn to reframe thoughts and surround yourself with what you need to find a happier life, as it’s within your grasp.

3. Control Thoughts, Reframe Situations

Understand that most situations are neutral; your perspective determines their impact. Cultivate the skill of controlling your thoughts and reframing situations to empower yourself.

4. Manage Life Expectations

Unhappiness stems from the gap between life’s events and your expectations of how life should be. Adjust your expectations to reduce discontentment.

5. Practice “Looking Down”

To foster realism and appreciation, “look down” at the suffering and lack around you or in the world, reminding yourself of your blessings and reducing feelings of entitlement.

6. Self-Reflect on Unhappiness

If you’re unhappy, ask yourself what you are doing to make yourself feel that way, what perspective you’re taking, or what emotions you’re ignoring.

7. Accept Suffering for Progress

Accept that suffering is a necessary part of progressing to enlightenment in life. By accepting it, suffering transforms into a natural part of the journey.

8. Cultivate Ability to Love

Being able to love and feel a connection to another being is a sufficient source of happiness, reflecting a divine part of yourself.

9. Focus on Basic Needs & Love

If your basic needs are met and you experience love, it becomes easier to work on your mind to achieve a state of happiness.

10. Be Grateful for Past Suffering

Recognize that past suffering has shaped you into who you are. Be grateful for the pain you’ve experienced, as it contributes to your current self.

11. Question Everything Humbly

Cultivate true intelligence by questioning everything, including what is said in this podcast. Humbly state your truth while acknowledging the possibility of being wrong, fostering continuous learning.

12. Self-Reflect on Triggers

If you feel defensive or triggered by differing perspectives, self-reflect on why this disproportionate emotional reaction occurs. Choose an empowering mindset instead of being a victim to external opinions.

13. Embrace Continuous Learning

To continue learning and evolving, be willing to remove old beliefs and replace them with new understandings that make more sense, engaging in continuous debate.

14. Mini Silent Sunday Retreats

Every other Sunday, from waking until 3 p.m., disconnect from external knowledge (no phone, books, speaking, or time-telling). Engage internally with just paper and pen, or instrumental music.

15. Annual 40-Day Silence Retreat

Go somewhere in nature for 40 days each year, refraining from words, listening to instrumental music, and allowing minimal phone checks for emergencies, to process thoughts and gain clarity.

16. Practice Intermittent Fasting

Extend your intermittent fast (e.g., stop eating at 4 p.m. and not eat again until 5 p.m. the next day) to give your digestive system a break and allow your mind to settle.

17. Give Mind a Silence Break

Allow your mind a break of silence to settle the constant analysis and suspended thoughts, leading to clarity and relaxation.

18. Regular Social Media Breaks

Go off social media for several weeks each summer to reduce external influences, allowing you to tune into your own thoughts, gain clarity, and strengthen your conviction in who you are.

19. Cultivate Power Over Cravings

Embrace the feeling of hunger without immediately eating, recognizing it as an opportunity to cultivate personal power and avoid being a slave to cravings and emotions.

20. Detach from Physical Attachments

Recognize that life is a zero-sum game where you come and leave with nothing. This perspective can empower you to detach from physical attachments and material possessions.

21. Practice “Dying Before You Die”

Engage in practices like walking slowly, silence, and fasting to achieve a state of detachment from the physical world, allowing you to be fully alive but not attached, akin to “dying before you die.”

22. Use Practices to Quiet Mind

Employ meditation, silence, long reflections, and breath work to shift the dominance of the mind that creates illusions, helping you realize a more expansive reality beyond physical experience.

23. Meditate for Non-Dual Experiences

Meditating regularly increases the likelihood of experiencing non-duality, where the boundaries between yourself and everything else dissolve, leading to a deeper understanding of existence.