Learn about how your mind works to better influence your mood and cope with daily challenges, as this educational component is key to managing mental health.
Develop the ability to think about your own thoughts (metacognition) to gain a “bird’s eye view” on your experiences, allowing for reflection and diffusion from intense thoughts.
Understand your personal values and regularly remind yourself of them, as this serves as a crucial tool for navigating life’s stresses, obstacles, and conflicting demands.
Dedicate time to map out your personal value system by listing different life areas (e.g., health, family, career) and for each, bullet point what truly matters to you and what kind of person you aspire to be within that area.
Regularly assess the importance of each life area and how well you are currently living in line with its associated values; use low scores as a non-critical opportunity to identify what’s pulling you away and how to steer back.
When reflecting on your life and values, always do so with a mindset of curiosity and exploration, rather than criticism or self-attack, to foster constructive self-awareness.
Engage in mindfulness by observing thoughts without judgment, and when your mind wanders, gently guide your attention back to the present moment, rather than trying to stop thoughts entirely.
Consciously work to enlarge the mental space between experiencing stress and your automatic response, allowing for more thoughtful and intentional reactions.
Recognize that feelings often come with urges to act, but you have the choice not to immediately follow every urge, allowing for more intentional responses.
When experiencing an unhelpful urge, such as staying in bed when feeling overwhelmed, try acting opposite to it (e.g., getting up and moving) to potentially shift your mood and outcome.
Engage in lighthearted exercises, like resisting the urge to crunch a mint, to build your awareness and ability to not act on urges in more challenging situations.
Cultivate a healthy relationship with failure, recognizing it as an inevitable and essential part of the learning process when striving for change or growth.
Challenge the belief that failure defines your worth; otherwise, a fear of failure can lead to a defensive way of living, causing your life to shrink as you avoid risks and opportunities.
Detach your sense of self-worth from external projects or public validation, understanding that your actions are separate from your core identity and value as a person.
Work on developing a firm sense of who you are, independent of external achievements or public profile, to build resilience and confidence in facing life changes.
Engage in journaling as a powerful tool for self-reflection and clarity, especially when unable to access therapy or when dealing with overwhelming emotions.
When reflecting on an experience, break it down by distinguishing between your thoughts (words/pictures in your head), your feelings (where you felt them physically), the urges you had, whether you acted on them, and the subsequent impact.
Write down your thoughts on paper to externalize them, which helps create distance and allows you to see them more objectively, reducing their immediate power over you.
When journaling, focus on freely expressing all your thoughts and feelings onto the page, rather than worrying about writing “the right things” or achieving perfection.
For protected and focused self-reflection, use a pen and paper for journaling in a distraction-free environment, away from electronic devices, and experiment with different methods to find what works best.
Actively work to increase your emotional vocabulary (emotion granularity) by finding specific words to describe your emotional experiences, as this ability is linked to better coping after stressful events.
Focus on finding words that resonate with your unique emotional experiences, even if they’re from other languages, rather than trying to perfectly match your feelings to universal labels.
Practice describing your feelings and associating them with specific scenarios to better predict when certain emotions will arise and understand the cause-and-effect relationships of your emotional responses.
Explore different attachment patterns (e.g., avoidant, anxious) to quickly identify your own style of relating to others, understanding that this pattern was learned early in life and can impact adult relationships.
Recognize that coping mechanisms learned in childhood, while effective then, may become destructive in adult relationships; identify these patterns to adapt your responses to current situations.
Engage in self-compassion exercises to address deeply ingrained patterns and foster healthier relationships with yourself and others.
When your threat response is triggered, actively feed your brain new, comforting information through self-soothing techniques to change your internal environment and manage distress.
Utilize your senses for self-soothing during distress, particularly smell (e.g., a comforting perfume or lavender), as it can be fast-acting in providing a sense of safety and calm.
Create a discreet self-soothing tool, such as a keyring filled with a calming scent like lavender, to carry with you and use in moments of distress (e.g., panic attacks) without drawing attention.
Create a personalized self-soothing box or collection of items that you uniquely associate with safety and comfort, such as a specific scent or a cherished photo, to use during difficult times.
Consistently practice small, simple skills every day, as their cumulative effect can significantly improve your life and make daily challenges easier to manage.
Regularly practice mental well-being tools, starting with conscious effort, until they become automatic responses in stressful situations, leading to calmer reactions.
Regularly assess if your current lifestyle aligns with your desired balance, and make small, continuous adjustments to steer towards your preferred direction, understanding that perfect balance is an ongoing process.
Imagine yourself at the end of your life and identify three key things you would want to have done or achieved, using this vision to guide your present actions and intentions.
Identify three specific activities that would genuinely make you happy this week, such as movement/exercise, connecting with friends, and focusing on nourishing food, and prioritize incorporating them into your schedule.
Translate your long-term relationship values into specific, actionable weekly goals, such as being fully present for a certain number of meals with family, to ensure consistent nourishment of important connections.
Dedicate 10-15 minutes daily to “step outside your life” and gain perspective, which can be achieved through activities like a walk or simply stepping away from your routine.
Engage in daily physical activity, like a jog, to gain perspective and a sense of calm, as consistent small efforts can accumulate to greater well-being than infrequent long breaks.
Make time for regular short breaks in nature, such as a couple of hours at the beach or a walk in the woods, as these can help you feel reset and recharged more frequently than waiting for a long holiday.
If the choice is between journaling on a device or not at all, choose to just start journaling using whatever medium is most accessible to you.
Consider using voice messages or speaking aloud to verbally journal, as voicing your thoughts can be a powerful way to gain clarity and process experiences, similar to therapy.
When communicating with or supporting someone, use the specific language they employ to describe their experiences, reflecting it back to them to help them feel understood and heard.
Actively seek out all available support and educate yourself from credible sources about mental health tools and strategies, as continuous learning can lead to gradual, positive change.
When feeling overwhelmed and isolated, challenge the mind’s conviction that you are alone and there’s no way out, recognizing that this is often untrue and there are always paths forward.
Recognize that overcoming difficult situations takes time and effort, viewing it as a marathon, not a sprint, to foster resilience.
Cultivate confidence in your ability to manage your own mental health, understanding that while support is available, you possess the inherent capacity to address your challenges.
Regularly remind yourself of your initial motivation and core purpose, especially when facing challenges or public scrutiny, to stay grounded and driven by impact.
Understand that mental health tools won’t guarantee perfection in every situation; accept that you will sometimes use them effectively and sometimes not, and that this is a normal part of the process.
Embrace patience in pursuing goals, recognizing that waiting for the right time, even years later, can lead to greater readiness and a more grounded experience of success.
Understand that your values can change over time based on life circumstances, so regularly check in with yourself to determine what matters most to you at any given point, rather than seeking a fixed “perfect” system.
Consider adopting “enthusiasm” as a personal value, consciously striving to approach all aspects of your life, from parenting to work, with a positive and energetic attitude.
Continuously re-evaluate your life’s direction and make efforts to steer back towards your core values and desired path, especially after life events pull you away.
Cultivate self-awareness to gain a “bird’s eye view” of your patterns, enabling you to recognize cycles and realize you have the choice to respond differently.
Surround yourself with people, like family, who keep you grounded and unaffected by external successes or public recognition, helping to maintain perspective on what truly matters.