To create a new personal reality and change your life, you must change your personality, which is comprised of how you think, act, and feel.
Before starting your day, identify thoughts, behaviors, and emotions you no longer want to embody by writing them down and becoming conscious of them. Then, mentally rehearse and emotionally teach your body how you do want to think, act, and feel, practicing until you can evoke these desired states on command.
Become deeply conscious of your unconscious thoughts, behaviors (e.g., complaining, blaming, judging), and emotions (e.g., guilt, sadness) by naming them, to prevent reverting to old patterns.
Focus on changing your thinking and approach to the world, as this is more important than lifestyle changes and will naturally lead to better lifestyle choices.
Avoid prolonged states of aggression, anger, fear, anxiety, and other stress-derived emotions, as living in emergency mode drains vital resources and impairs bodily functions like immunity and digestion.
Understand that repeatedly remembering past traumatic events produces the same stress chemistry in your body as if they were happening again, and that your recounted memories may be inaccurate or embellished to avoid change.
Cease constantly recounting the story of your past, especially if it’s miserable or inaccurate, and instead begin to ‘romance’ and fall in love with the story of your desired future.
Be aware that the arousal from stress hormones can be addictive, leading people to subconsciously seek problems to reaffirm this addiction and become accustomed to a life they dislike.
Approach your life with curiosity, asking what it might be like to feel differently and exploring what lies beyond your limited thoughts, familiar emotions, and habitual negative patterns.
View your life as an experiment, making the effort to change your thinking and practice new mental skills, as there is no downside to trying to improve.