← The Peter Attia Drive

#76 - Kyle Kingsbury: Finding meaning, depression, and psychedelics

Oct 21, 2019 1h 41m 33 insights
<p>In this episode, Kyle Kingsbury, retired UFC fighter and director of human optimization at Onnit, discusses the purpose and meaning that football and MMA gave him but which also acted as a distraction from his inner demons. Kyle opens up about his use of PEDs (steroids, testosterone, HGH) in college and talks about some of the misconceptions around them. Next, Kyle talks about his battle with depression and a close call with suicide that lead to life-changing experiences with psilocybin and ayahuasca—which really became the turning point in his own journey towards being more emotionally healthy, finding inner peace, and being a better husband and father. *
Actionable Insights

1. Seek Help for Self-Harm

If currently experiencing any thoughts of self-harm or suicide, it is imperative to seek out medical help immediately.

2. Break Generational Pain Cycles

Recognize and actively work to break cycles of generational pain and trauma, aiming to provide a different experience for your children and foster a legacy of emotional health.

3. Forgive for Self-Liberation

Understand that forgiveness is primarily a gift to oneself, releasing the burden of anger, pain, and resentment towards others, which can profoundly affect one’s well-being and perception of the world.

4. Deep Self-Reflection with Ayahuasca

Engage with plant medicines like ayahuasca under proper guidance and setting to facilitate deep self-reflection, uncover childhood issues, recognize destructive patterns, and foster lasting shifts in self-perception and behavior. (Note: The substances discussed are illegal and carry physical, physiological, psychological, and legal risks; this information is purely for informational purposes.)

5. Approach Psychedelics with Intention

If considering psychedelics, approach them with clear intention, respect, and reverence for the plants, ensuring a safe and appropriate environment, as this can facilitate deep self-discovery and lasting inner peace. (Note: The substances discussed are illegal and carry physical, physiological, psychological, and legal risks; this information is purely for informational purposes.)

6. Practice Surrender in Challenges

When facing overwhelming or emotionally unbearable experiences, practice surrendering to the moment and letting go of the desire to control or change it, as this can be a pathway to acceptance and eventual relief.

7. Address Underlying Emotional Pain

Recognize that depression can stem from a feeling of hopelessness and unaddressed childhood trauma, and actively seek ways to process and heal these underlying emotional pains.

8. Utilize Breath Work for Calm

Practice slow breathing techniques (e.g., 2:1 exhale to inhale, 4-7-8, or 10-10-10) upon waking and before bed to quiet negative ‘monkey mind’ chatter, control anxiety, and improve sleep.

9. Distance from Negative Environments

After experiencing a low point, intentionally create distance from detrimental social environments (e.g., party atmosphere) and focus on setting new, meaningful goals to foster personal growth and shift perspective.

10. Prioritize Sleep & Nutrition

To achieve physical gains and improve well-being, prioritize getting adequate sleep and eating well, focusing on sufficient protein and calories.

11. Seek Curated, Detailed Information

Recognize the overwhelming volume of information available and prioritize seeking out highly curated and detailed resources, such as comprehensive show notes, to make better decisions and improve life quality.

12. Cultivate Compassion for Others

Develop compassion for others by recognizing that everyone navigates their own unique life path and learns lessons at their own pace, and it’s not one’s place to judge or dictate their journey.

13. Nurture Confidence & Connection

In parenting, foster confidence (e.g., through martial arts), allow children to pursue their own interests, and consider reconnecting them to ancestral roots through experiences like wilderness survival camps or guided plant medicine rites of passage with trusted elders.

14. Help Kids Unplug & Gain Perspective

Encourage children, especially those heavily engaged with screens, to unplug and engage in experiences that help them see the ‘big picture’ and reconnect with what truly matters beyond immediate digital gratification.

15. Vet Psychedelic Practitioners Thoroughly

When considering plant medicine ceremonies, thoroughly vet practitioners to ensure they are experienced and reputable (‘black belts’), as improper guidance can lead to lasting psychological damage.

16. Explore Fish Oil for Brain Health

Consider exploring holistic supplementation, such as fish oil, for brain health, as suggested by a psychiatrist as an alternative to pharmaceutical interventions.

17. Find Healthy Physical Outlets

Engage in physical activities like martial arts to provide camaraderie, physical interaction, continuous learning, and a healthy outlet for emotional release and stress.

18. Mindful & Technical Training

When training in high-impact sports, adopt a mindful and technical approach to sparring, focusing on skill development rather than constantly going ‘full-go’ to minimize injury risk and promote longevity.

19. Prioritize Injury Avoidance

Recognize that injury avoidance is a critical, underappreciated aspect of professional sports, and focus on preservation, especially during the season, to extend one’s career.

20. Realistic Career Goal Assessment

Realistically assess the likelihood of achieving top-tier career goals (e.g., NFL) and be prepared to pivot or adjust expectations if the path becomes unlikely, prioritizing playing at the highest possible level if that’s the core motivation.

21. Cultivate Coachability for Learning

Develop a coachable mindset, being open to absorbing as much knowledge and guidance as possible from experienced mentors to rapidly acquire and improve new skills.

22. Pursue Resonant Academic Subjects

Focus on academic subjects like psychology, sociology, and communication that feel personally relevant and applicable to life, as these can provide lasting value and engagement.

23. Value Practical Hands-On Skills

Appreciate and learn practical skills like working with your hands (e.g., car maintenance, construction) as they can be enjoyable, well-paying, and provide useful life knowledge.

24. Recognize Value of Separation

Understand that sometimes separation in relationships, even divorce, can lead to a deeper sense of peace and improved well-being for all involved if communication is consistently dysfunctional.

25. Address Root Causes of Anxiety

Be aware that anti-anxiety medications provide temporary relief, but the underlying, unworked-through issues will resurface once the medication is stopped, highlighting the need to address root causes.

26. Be Discerning with Psychiatric Meds

Approach psychiatric medications with discernment, considering personal and family experiences, and communicate openly with your psychiatrist if a prescribed medication significantly alters your personality or emotional range in undesirable ways.

27. Substances Amplify Existing Traits

Understand that substances like anabolic steroids or alcohol tend to amplify pre-existing personality traits (e.g., anger, kindness) rather than creating new ones, much like money amplifies a person’s inherent nature.

28. Incorporate Ritual for Intention

Engage in rituals like traditional sweat lodges before significant endeavors (e.g., fight camp) to set intentions and after for healing and reflection, fostering mental and emotional well-being.

29. Understand Covert Depression

Read ‘I Don’t Want to Talk About It’ by Terrence Real to understand the distinction between overt depression (classic symptoms) and covert depression, which manifests as addiction, anger, aggression, or workaholism, all stemming from underlying pain.

30. Read ‘How to Change Your Mind’

Read Michael Pollan’s ‘How to Change Your Mind’ to gain a better understanding of psychedelics and their potential, as it offers a well-researched and compelling perspective on the topic.

31. Read Llewellyn’s Anabolics

Consult Dr. William Llewellyn’s ‘Anabolics’ for a deep, unemotional dive into the pharmacology and chemistry of anabolic substances, offering comprehensive information without editorializing.

32. Research Substances on Erowid.org

Utilize erowid.org to research the pharmacology, chemistry, legality, and user trip reports of various substances, including plant medicines, for informational purposes.

33. Support Podcast for Exclusive Content

Consider supporting the podcast directly by signing up for a monthly subscription to gain full access to exclusive show notes, participate in AMA episodes, and get deals on products the host loves.