<p><a href="https://peterattiamd.com/lewishowes/?utm_source=podcast-feed&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=230306-pod-lewishowes&utm_content=230306-pod-lewishowes-podfeed"> View the Show Notes Page for This Episode</a></p> <p><a href="https://peterattiamd.com/subscribe/?utm_source=podcast-feed&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=230306-pod-lewishowes&utm_content=230306-pod-lewishowes-podfeed"> Become a Member to Receive Exclusive Content</a></p> <p><a href="https://peterattiamd.com/newsletter/?utm_source=podcast-feed&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=230306-pod-lewishowes&utm_content=230306-pod-lewishowes-podfeed"> Sign Up to Receive Peter's Weekly Newsletter</a></p> <p>Lewis Howes is a New York Times best-selling author, entrepreneur, speaker, and host of the popular podcast, The School of Greatness. In this episode, Lewis opens up about the various hardships and traumatic events he experienced starting at a very young age and reveals the valuable lessons he learned as he worked through those traumas to improve his emotional health. He talks about how his past hardships likely contributed to his success in business and athletics, only to leave him feeling unsatisfied and unfulfilled. Next, he discusses how many aspects of his life were suffering, the inflection point that drove Lewis to seek help, and the long but beautiful healing journey that followed. Lewis makes the case that adversity, and even trauma, can be beneficial if one finds meaning in tribulations and has the courage to face one's fears and insecurities. Finally, Lewis shares the many modalities of therapy that helped him along the way and gives advice for those wanting to find inner peace and live a fulfilling, rich, abundant, joyful life.</p> <p><strong>We discuss:</strong></p> <ul type="disc"> <li>Lewis's upbringing and the impact of his older brother going to prison [2:45];</li> <li>Finding lessons in tragedy and adversity [10:45];</li> <li>Lasting trauma from being sexually abused at age 5 [13:15];</li> <li>Inflection point that drove Lewis to seek help, and a beautiful experience at a therapeutic workshop [16:45];</li> <li>A powerful workshop on emotional intelligence jump started Lewis's healing journey [27:30];</li> <li>How being authentic can strengthen bonds with family and bring inner peace [39:30];</li> <li>Comparing adversity with trauma and finding meaning in struggle [45:15];</li> <li>Association between adverse childhood events and diseases in adulthood [56:15];</li> <li>How addressing his issues with intimate relationships helped Lewis overcome physical pain related to his past trauma [59:15];</li> <li>Healing is a journey that takes time and requires courage to face your fears and insecurities [1:08:45];</li> <li>How Lewis thinks about mortality and uses it as motivation to pursue his dreams [1:13:00];</li> <li>How anyone can benefit from therapy or coaching, and Lewis's advice for finding inner peace [1:22:45];</li> <li>Lewis's newest book, The Greatness Mindset [1:29:15]; and</li> <li>More.</li> </ul> <p>Connect With Peter on <a href="https://twitter.com/PeterAttiaMD">Twitter</a>, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/peterattiamd/">Instagram</a>, <a href="https://www.facebook.com/peterattiamd/">Facebook</a> and <a href="https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8kGsMa0LygSX9nkBcBH1Sg">YouTube</a></p>
Actionable Insights
1. Cultivate Inner Peace
Prioritize cultivating inner peace as the ‘highest currency’ to navigate external problems and stresses with poise, grace, and mature leadership, rather than reactivity and overwhelm.
2. Proactively Seek Self-Improvement
Be open and willing to try various personal development modalities and advice from experts, proactively engaging in self-improvement before reaching a crisis point, rather than waiting for life’s ‘perfect storm’.
3. Heal Past Traumas for Peace
Face and process emotional and psychological traumas from your past to achieve internal freedom and peace, as unresolved wounds can cause physical and emotional suffering that holds you back.
4. Seek Emotional Intelligence Coaching
Seek out coaches, therapists, or workshops for emotional intelligence, relationships, and personal growth, viewing it as continuous improvement like elite athletes do, rather than waiting for a crisis to force change.
5. Embrace Vulnerability, Overcome Shame
Work on self-acceptance and forgiveness for past experiences, as shame can hinder personal growth and the ability to serve others. Overcoming the fear of vulnerability can lead to unexpected healing and deeper connection.
6. Recognize Self-Abandonment Patterns
Identify and break patterns of abandoning your values, vision, and identity to please others in relationships. This often stems from unconscious attempts to ‘fix’ past family dynamics and is detrimental to personal well-being.
7. Establish Personal Values, Boundaries
Establish and uphold personal values and boundaries in relationships, even if it means discomfort or ending a relationship. This is crucial to avoid self-abandonment and foster inner peace and authenticity.
Develop emotional tools for mature, peaceful, and grateful communication, especially when addressing frustrations in personal and professional partnerships. This enables effective resolution and stronger bonds.
9. Cultivate Internal Freedom
Understand that you are free to walk away from unaligned situations and relationships, realizing that internal freedom is possible even if external circumstances are not perfect or easy.
10. Pursue Dreams Without Regret
Embrace a ’no regrets’ mindset, actively pursuing dreams and goals without fear of failure, especially when confronted with the fragility of life. The aim is to avoid dying with unfulfilled aspirations.
11. Actively Combat Self-Doubt
Actively combat self-doubt and insecurities, as they are major barriers to pursuing and achieving dreams. Self-doubt can prevent you from launching your full potential and trying new things.
12. Reframe Adversity for Meaning
Actively seek meaning and useful tools from all challenges and adversities in life, viewing them as opportunities for future power, wisdom, and service to others rather than purely negative experiences.
13. Focus on Journey, Not Results
When pursuing goals, focus on the learning, connections, and meaningful moments experienced along the way, rather than solely on the final results. This perspective leads to greater fulfillment and growth.
14. Practice Daily Mortality Reflection
Practice daily reflection on mortality to cultivate a deeper appreciation for life and motivate purposeful action. Recognizing that life is not guaranteed can provide clarity and courage.
15. Don’t Let Age Limit You
Challenge the mindset that you are ’too young’ or ’too old’ to try new things or chase dreams. Age should not be an excuse for inaction or for limiting your potential.
16. Seek Structured Environments
Seek out structured environments with clear rules and guidelines, especially if you lack structure in your life. This can be extremely transformational for personal discipline and organization.
17. Gauge Emotional Readiness Before Sharing
Before sharing deep personal traumas, ask trusted loved ones, ‘Is there anything I could ever say or do that would make you not love me?’ This helps gauge their emotional availability and readiness to receive the information.
18. Trauma Healing Improves Sleep
Addressing and healing past traumas can significantly improve sleep quality and reduce rumination. Lewis experienced falling asleep within minutes after years of sleepless nights following his healing journey.
19. External Success Not Enough
Recognize that external success alone does not guarantee internal fulfillment or happiness. Lewis found that accolades and achievements left him feeling unfulfilled and even more angry when underlying emotional issues were not addressed.