Stop focusing on your own career advancement and instead focus on taking care of your people, as they will then support you and not let you fail.
See what needs to be done and step forward to address it, then exercise the art of getting people to want to join you in getting it done.
Cultivate a presence that makes other people feel bigger, more comfortable taking risks, and more creative, rather than making yourself the focus.
Develop a real curiosity about the world and other people’s perspectives, as certainty can prevent learning and lead to missing crucial signals.
Do not be overly certain about what is right or wrong, as this closes you off to learning from others and recognizing potential problems until it’s too late.
Consistently practice desired behaviors, even if they don’t initially align with your internal beliefs, as this repeated action will gradually shift your mindsets, beliefs, and values in a positive direction.
Strive for authenticity by ensuring your behaviors are consistently aligned with your beliefs and values, which will foster positive mindsets.
Increase candor by sharing opinions and ‘stories’ you make up about others, as this provides valuable feedback and helps uncover hidden dynamics.
Consciously work to make the invisible visible by sharing the ‘stories’ you tell yourself about situations or people, as this allows for course correction and better understanding.
Approach feedback as a routine you commit to and master, practicing it consistently so it becomes second nature and part of your style, rather than just a technique.
When giving critical feedback, balance it with an equal number of positive remarks that are as vivid, elaborate, and detailed as the criticisms.
Ensure your relationships have a balance of positive and negative interactions, as too much negative feedback will cause people to withdraw, shut down, or become defensive.
When criticized, first assume the criticism is correct and allow yourself to digest it before responding, as this helps you find truth or understand the ‘why’.
Adopt a ‘Working Together Management System’ with five interconnected elements: principles and practices, governance process, a leadership team that coaches and facilitates, a creating value roadmap, and a regular business plan review, all underpinned by a positive culture.
Establish a weekly family meeting with a structured agenda that includes collective chores (e.g., tidying, laundry), sharing individual plans for the week, identifying needs for support, reflecting on family behaviors, and discussing improvements.
Shift your leadership style to coaching and facilitating, rather than telling people what to do, to keep the team aligned and empowered.
As a leader, hold yourself and your team responsible and accountable for consistently following the established management system and its processes.
Practice ‘Fact and Story’ by stating a factual observation about someone, then sharing the ‘story I make up about that’ with curiosity, to encourage candid and constructive feedback within a team.
When receiving feedback or criticism, shift from asking ‘Is it true?’ to ‘How is it true?’ to find the underlying gem and learn from it.
Approach complex situations by slowing down, taking a breath, and putting in the effort required to understand them, rather than seeking instant, simplistic solutions.
As a curious leader, listen to subtle signals and ‘whispers’ of potential issues, even if you don’t believe them all, to stay attuned to what’s happening.
Learn from other leaders but do not copy them directly; instead, cultivate your own unique artistry in getting people to want to join you.
Be humble about your own sense of self and how you will act under pressure, as context matters and you don’t truly know until you are in a situation.
Cultivate relationships with allies, advocates, and mentors who can provide support, guidance, and perspective, especially when facing friction or difficult situations.
Once you have the authority, proactively address systemic issues that previously caused reactive problems, using past experiences to drive improvement.
Hold business plan reviews on a tight, regular schedule (e.g., weekly) to focus on changes, offer help, and maintain continuous progress, knowing you’ll reconvene soon.
Ensure all necessary disciplines are represented on your leadership team to avoid leaving anyone out and to facilitate comprehensive alignment and decision-making.
Do not provide only positive feedback, as an imbalance of too much praise can make individuals overly sensitive and alarmed when they eventually receive criticism.
Regularly review your relationships to identify which ones are out of balance (too much negative or too much positive feedback) and take steps to rebalance them.
Proactively assess and rebalance your relationships to ensure a healthy mix of positive and negative interactions, and when giving specific critical feedback, prepare vivid and elaborate positive points to match the detail of your criticisms.
As a family principle, communicate any actions that could potentially embarrass or make the family proud ahead of time.