Address problems early in business, life, or relationships through early conversations and collaboration to prevent unpredictable and worse outcomes on the back end.
Do not lower your standards or expectations, as having high expectations prevents you from tolerating bad relationships, work environments, or employees, benefiting yourself, your company, and serving as a model for others.
View your business or deep interests as something you do, not who you are, to maintain objectivity and make optimal decisions, as excessive emotional attachment can skew judgment and investments.
Approach difficult conversations by framing them as “us versus a problem” rather than “me versus you,” intentionally pulling the other person to your side to foster collaboration, reduce defensiveness, and create openness.
If you feel limited or wonder why others achieve things you don’t, examine your thinking for cognitive ruts, and actively seek to expand your perspective to create movement and overcome self-imposed limitations.
To achieve exceptional results and escape cognitive ruts, actively seek and integrate ideas, methods, and knowledge from outside your immediate field, profession, or traditional ways of thinking.
When challenging someone directly, ensure they know you care deeply about them and their performance, and that your feedback aims to make them better, as this approach is effective while punitive methods are counterproductive.
When experiencing negative emotions or events, intentionally decide that a bad moment or hour does not have to become a bad day, and consciously reset your mindset to prevent it from bleeding into the rest of your day.
Before engaging with others, be intentional about how you want them to feel and what outcomes you desire, ensuring your mood and actions create engagement and motivation rather than blocking desired results.
As a leader, consciously step into your role and bring your best “work self” to work, leaving personal issues aside, to ensure effectiveness and lead from the front.
To uncover blind spots, solicit anonymous 360-degree feedback from various people in your ecosystem (direct reports, skip levels, board members) after setting the stage for honest input, as anonymity encourages candid information.
Implement robust systems for receiving genuine feedback on your own performance, beyond simple rating scales, to truly improve and broaden your scope of vision.
When preparing for difficult conversations, intentionally choose language and frame feedback as opportunities or challenges, rather than criticisms, to avoid harm and empower the recipient.
Frame feedback using deliberate, strength-based language, focusing on opportunities, challenges, and “next levels of operation,” to empower individuals and avoid disempowering terms.
When giving feedback, aim to cultivate a “survivor mindset” in others, rather than a “victim mindset,” by framing challenges as opportunities for growth and improvement.
Approach your work as a career, not just a job, by having above-average standards and being “all in,” which signals commitment and leads to different opportunities and treatment.
Cultivate deep care for your work or chosen activities, as people naturally hold themselves to higher standards when they genuinely care about something.
When setting high standards, inspire people to rise to their potential by seeing something in them they don’t see themselves, rather than using fear or intimidation, which helps them operate at higher levels.
Pay attention to how you feel after interactions; if you consistently feel drained, insecure, or beaten down rather than energized, it’s a significant red flag indicating a potentially toxic relationship.
Recognize people who consistently violate your set boundaries as a red flag in relationships, as this indicates a lack of respect for your needs and commitments.
Be wary of individuals who are not actively supportive or who diminish you, as this can be a red flag in relationships.
To end unproductive relationships, be direct by stating your current focus and unavailability for certain activities, allowing people to get the hint and eventually fade away.
To foster creativity and innovation, intentionally read and follow people from diverse fields like art, philosophy, and biographies, ensuring your learning isn’t confined to your primary domain.
Define personal success as achieving optionality across various life areas, including time, future choices, living location, and the scale and type of help you can offer others, rather than solely monetary wealth.