← The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

The Unhappy Millionaire

Sep 24, 2019 37m 39s 11 insights
<p>How can winning the lottery ruin your life - while contracting an incurable disease feel like 'a gift'? Dr Laurie Santos hears about dreams come true and nightmares realised; and talks with Dr Dan Gilbert about why human happiness isn't defined by these major events in the way we all assume.</p><p>For an even deeper dive into the research we talk about in the show visit <a href="https://www.happinesslab.fm/">happinesslab.fm </a></p><p> </p> Learn more about your ad-choices at <a href="https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com">https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com</a><p>See <a href="https://omnystudio.com/listener">omnystudio.com/listener</a> for privacy information.</p>
Actionable Insights

1. Cultivate Habits for Joy

Focus on adopting better habits and behaviors as the true source of joy, rather than expecting perfect life circumstances to bring lasting happiness.

2. Understand Hedonic Adaptation

Recognize that you will eventually return to a baseline level of happiness after both good and bad events, and don’t mistake this natural return as a sign that something is wrong. View happiness as a ‘vacation destination’ you visit, not a permanent place to live.

3. Trust Your Resilience

Have faith in your ‘psychological immune system’ to help you adapt and recover from negative events more quickly and effectively than you anticipate, even from severe adversity. Consciously practice bravery and reduce worrying by remembering this emotional superpower.

4. Reframe Adversity as Growth

Actively reframe adverse experiences as opportunities for growth, learning, and identifying true support systems, transforming potential negatives into positive outcomes.

Understand that increased income beyond approximately $75,000 annually does not significantly increase happiness or reduce stress, challenging the common belief that more money always leads to a better life.

6. Account for Impact Bias

Recognize and account for ‘impact bias’ by understanding that both positive and negative events will likely have less intense and shorter-lived emotional impacts than your mind predicts.

7. Improve Future Simulations

When mentally simulating future events, actively consider potential negative consequences, losses, or overlooked details that your brain might miss, to make more accurate emotional predictions.

8. Embrace Self-Generated Happiness

Allow yourself to rationalize negative events, as the happiness derived from self-generated rationalizations is a valid and often long-lasting form of happiness, not inferior to happiness from objectively good events.

9. Leverage Unique Circumstances

Utilize unique personal circumstances, even those stemming from tragedy or perceived flaws, to connect with people, create meaningful dialogue, and open new opportunities.

10. Consider Walk-and-Talk Therapy

Explore ‘walk and talk’ as a method for problem-solving or therapy, as some individuals find they think better and process emotions more effectively while on their feet.

11. Be Wary of Lottery Wins

Exercise caution when wishing for extreme windfalls like lottery wins, as research indicates they often don’t bring expected happiness and can lead to significant life disruptions and misery.