Be kind to your family members and to yourself, especially during intense and rulebook-free times, to prevent difficult situations from spiraling into something seriously bad.
When your partner is snippy, develop more generous explanations for their actions by considering they might be overwhelmed and doing their best in difficult situations, rather than assuming disrespect. This ’looking with new eyes’ approach leads to better relationship outcomes.
During highly stressful periods, expect less from your partner in areas where you are both struggling and normalize feelings of frustration. Avoid catastrophizing these experiences or questioning the foundation of your relationship.
When experiencing conflict, try to think about it from the perspective of a neutral third party who wants the best for everyone involved. This practice can improve relationship satisfaction, trust, intimacy, and passion.
Make relationship priorities like intimacy, deep conversations, or shared games a conscious priority at least some of the time, rather than just fitting them into leftover time slots. This prevents the slow erosion of connection.
Go back through your relationship’s repertoire and remember activities you both enjoyed together but forgot due to the pace of regular life (e.g., playing games, sharing wine). Attempting these can help you connect or reconnect.
Utilize the increased time at home to focus on children together, turning the challenges of parenting during a pandemic into an opportunity for family bonding and shared experiences.
Despite difficult circumstances, take a moment to acknowledge and appreciate the positive aspects of forced family time, such as reduced distractions and opportunities for shared activities like watching a movie or working on arithmetic together.
Identify what you and your partner are good at as a couple in the current circumstances and actively find ways to make the most of those strengths.
Attend to specific areas of potential conflict or frustration in your relationship that are real ‘danger spots.’ Figure out ways to mitigate or reduce these frustrations to prevent them from escalating.
Have direct conversations to solve problems by sharing what is frustrating to you and listening to your partner’s perspective. This open communication can lead to immediate improvements.
Dedicate extra minutes and conscious thought to caring about your relationship and family. Recognizing that even small, intentional efforts can significantly improve relationship quality over time.
View any current ’time windfalls’ (e.g., saved commute time, reduced work hours) as an incredible opportunity to invest in and strengthen your relationships with your spouse, significant other, or children.
When confused or fearful, remember that looking for answers in evidence-based science is always the best way to go for understanding and addressing challenges.