Adopt an ‘imperfectionist’ approach to life, assuming you’ll never do things perfectly and there will always be too much to do. This allows you to develop the willingness to act on what truly matters without the tormenting mirage of perfection.
Stop waiting for a ‘fantasy day’ when all minor tasks are cleared before tackling important projects or relationships. Develop the skill of acting on what truly matters right now, even when your mental or physical ‘decks’ are not perfectly clear.
Be wary of the alluring promise of optimizing yourself to do everything and never disappoint anyone, as this is impossible for finite humans. Rejecting this illusion allows you to make necessary choices, prioritize, and avoid filling your life with unwanted tasks.
Reject the ‘productivity debt’ mindset where you feel you owe a certain output to justify your existence, as this only aims for zero and is depressing. Instead, view your daily actions as building credit, expressing inherent adequacy rather than striving for it.
Instead of endlessly researching or planning the ‘perfect’ system or method, just start doing the desired activity, even for a short time. Over-planning can be counterproductive, intimidating, and prevents actual engagement with the task.
Accept that you cannot absorb or care about every piece of information or every good cause, as the supply is infinite. Treat information like a river, picking out what you need without guilt for what flows by, and be willing to neglect some causes to make an impact on others.
Stop trying to ‘cross every bridge’ of future worries prematurely, as true security about the future is unattainable. By accepting the inevitability of this situation, you can relax in the present and let future events unfold as they will.
Be comfortable with not ‘whole-assing’ everything, recognizing that many tasks don’t require maximum effort. Allow yourself to give less energy and attention to some things, permitting yourself to glide or coast through them.
Apply the ‘reverse golden rule’ by not treating yourself in ways you wouldn’t treat a friend or colleague. Avoid berating yourself with harsh internal monologues, instead adopting a stance of self-friendliness that is manageable and kind.
Embrace ‘scruffy hospitality’ by inviting people over even if your house is messy or the meal isn’t perfect, rather than striving for an immaculate facade. This makes hosting easier, more frequent, and fosters deeper, more authentic connections with guests.
Avoid trying to implement major, permanent changes at the New Year, as this piles on pressure and can be counterproductive. Instead, be willing to try things out, experiment, and do them for a little while or even just once, without the pressure of total transformation.
Do not approach the practice of imperfectionism with a perfectionist mindset, as it’s easy to turn new ideas into new things to do perfectly. Remind yourself that the goal is not to perfectly embrace imperfection, but to continuously work on it.
Don’t excessively worry about future challenges, as you will meet them with the same inner resources you use for present difficulties. Reflect on past experiences where you overcame perceived insurmountable obstacles, trusting your ability to handle what comes.
If you’re overwhelmed by worry, schedule a specific time in the future (e.g., two or three weeks) to ‘freak out’ about the issue. This creates an immediate island of calm and often reveals that the concern has resolved itself by the scheduled time.
Keep a ‘done list’ of completed tasks throughout the day to shift from a deficit-based mindset to one where you build credit and acknowledge your accomplishments. This helps you recognize your adequacy rather than constantly striving to achieve it.
Understand that all lists, including those of global suffering or critical causes, are ‘menus’ from which you must choose, rather than buckets to be emptied. This perspective allows for a lighter spirit and more effective action by focusing on selected items.
Maintain two lists: one endless list for all potential tasks and another with a fixed, small number of slots (e.g., 5-10) for current priorities. This helps you focus on what’s manageable while acknowledging the larger pool of things to do.
Actively seek ways to repeatedly engage with imperfectionist concepts, such as through structured reading or daily reflection. This counters the tendency to believe you can master these ideas ‘once and for all,’ reinforcing ongoing practice.
Practice regular journaling, such as ‘morning pages,’ not as a rigid task but as a naturally useful habit for self-reflection. This helps keep you honest, on track, and aware when you’re trying to perfect new concepts.