Do not give children a smartphone until at least age 14 or high school. Provide a basic flip phone or watch for calls and texts to prevent exposure to the internet’s dangers and addiction during critical developmental years.
Prevent children from accessing social media platforms until they are at least 16 years old. These platforms are designed to exploit developing brains, leading to chronic social comparison, anxiety, and dangerous interactions.
Support and advocate for policies that make schools phone-free environments. This ensures children can pay attention in class, improving educational outcomes and countering declining test scores globally.
Encourage more independence, free play, and real-world responsibility for children, as they need to develop by engaging with their environment unsupervised. By age eight, children should have some independence to develop crucial skills like conflict resolution and negotiation.
Begin having honest conversations about technology with children from a young age, even toddlers. Narrate your own screen activities to help them understand the purpose and context of digital interactions.
Develop a family media agreement as an ongoing dialogue to set boundaries and guidelines for technology use. This agreement should be revisited regularly to adjust rules based on the child’s development and evolving digital landscape.
Use parental controls to disable non-essential phone functions (like apps and internet) during specific times, such as school hours or bedtime, allowing only calls and texts. This provides children relief from constant online pressure and aids focus on sleep or homework.
Consistently discuss the digital footprint with children, explaining that everything shared online leaves a permanent, traceable trail. Emphasize the risks of screenshots, personal information, and interacting with strangers, akin to teaching road safety.
Talk to children about the difference between online perfection and real life, especially on social media. Explain product placement and how influencers are compensated, helping them understand that projected images often set false aspirations.
Observe how children react to different technologies for signs of struggle, such as acting out after games or feeling inadequate compared to online content. Consider family predispositions to mental health issues when assessing risks.
Empower children to recognize when technology negatively impacts their mental health and discuss coping strategies. Engage in conversations about mental health at any age, helping them develop tools to self-regulate rather than just banning devices.
Keep phones and tablets in common areas of the home, not private rooms. This allows parents to easily observe children’s screen activities and be mindful of their digital engagement.
Do not allow children or anyone under adulthood to use Instagram. The platform is strongly correlated with chronic social comparison, depression, and anxiety, particularly for girls regarding face and body image.
Prevent children from using Snapchat due to its inherent dangers, including connecting them with strangers involved in sextortion, drug dealing, or gun sales. The disappearing picture feature creates a false sense of security, leading to severe harm.
Refrain from using TikTok, especially for anyone under 18, and ideally for adults as well. The platform is highly addictive and detrimental to attention spans, potentially rewiring the brain to constantly crave quick stimulation.
Give yourself self-compassion as a parent navigating the complex challenges of raising children in a rapidly changing technological landscape, acknowledging the lack of established guidelines for these new issues.
Utilize the free online course ‘The Science of Wellbeing for Parents’ at drlaurisantos.com/parents for additional strategies and guidance on supporting children’s mental health in the digital age.