← The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos

Help Others to Help Yourself

Mar 30, 2020 28m 56s 17 insights
<p>College student Liam Elkind studied happiness in the class taught by Dr Laurie Santos. When the Covid 19 crisis hit, he knew exactly what to do to fight the negative emotions this pandemic arouses in us all - he helped set up a volunteer group called Invisible Hands to support vulnerable neighbors.</p><p>Compassion expert David DeSteno explains why helping others can improve our own wellbeing while protecting us from emotional burnout. And with a guided meditation Dr Santos shows that compassion is thing we can nurture and develop.</p><p> </p> Learn more about your ad-choices at <a href="https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com">https://www.iheartpodcastnetwork.com</a><p>See <a href="https://omnystudio.com/listener">omnystudio.com/listener</a> for privacy information.</p>
Actionable Insights

1. Prioritize Compassion for Survival

Recognize and prioritize compassion not as a luxury, but as a fundamental necessity for human survival, as it drives the cooperative behaviors needed to overcome crises together.

2. Cultivate Compassion, Not Just Empathy

To avoid burnout when others are suffering, cultivate compassion—the desire to relieve distress—rather than solely relying on empathy, which can lead to feeling overwhelmed by others’ pain.

3. Perform Loving-Kindness Meditation

Practice loving-kindness meditation by first focusing on your breath, then mentally sending good wishes (‘May you be happy, healthy, care for yourself joyfully, and be safe’) to a loved one, then to another close person, then to yourself, and finally to your entire community, monitoring your ‘heart space’ throughout.

4. Cultivate Compassion for Sacrifice

Cultivating compassion, even within your family, will make you more willing to make necessary sacrifices, such as social isolating or helping vulnerable neighbors, by aligning your impulses with altruistic actions.

5. Align Desires with Compassion

By cultivating an emotion of compassion, you can align your internal impulses to genuinely want to sacrifice for others, making it easier to do hard things without fighting against conflicting desires.

6. Boost Well-being by Helping

Actively helping other people is something that can significantly boost your personal well-being, especially during times of crisis and widespread difficulty.

7. Help Others, Be Happier

Engaging in acts of helping others is a scientifically proven way to make yourself happier and improve your overall well-being.

8. Become a Hero Yourself

While it’s beneficial to look for heroes, it is even more rewarding and impactful to actively become a ‘hero’ yourself by engaging in acts of help and service for others.

9. Actively Help Vulnerable People

If you feel useless when told to ‘do nothing’ during a crisis, actively seek ways to help vulnerable populations, such as coordinating free grocery deliveries for the elderly and immunocompromised.

10. Prioritize Social Connection in Aid

When providing aid, prioritize social connection by calling recipients ahead of time to engage them in conversation, as isolation can be a major difficulty for those receiving help.

11. Offer Financial Subsidies

In times of crisis, consider offering financial subsidies to individuals who are economically impacted, such as those laid off or freelancers unable to find work.

12. Embrace Mutual Aid

Reframe community support as ‘mutual aid,’ recognizing that it’s a reciprocal process where communities come together to help one another, not just a one-way service.

13. Initiate Gratitude’s Upward Spiral

By helping others, you can initiate an ‘upward spiral’ where recipients feel grateful and are then motivated to ‘pay it forward,’ spreading kindness and expanding the network of support.

14. Expand Compassion Through Giving

When you engage in giving and experience compassion, it evokes a continuous desire to help even wider circles of people, extending your support to strangers you might not know.

15. Build Community Trust & Connection

Engage in or support community programs that facilitate interaction and mutual aid among neighbors, as building trust and connection is a key predictor of a community’s resilience during crises.

16. Look for the Helpers

In tragic or fearful times, actively seek out ’the helpers’ in your community, as seeing their actions can instill a sense of hope.

17. Seek Evidence-Based Science

When feeling confused or fearful, remember that looking for answers in evidence-based science is always the best way to go to find solutions.