To control appetites, the best strategy is to avoid temptations by removing them from your environment, such as turning off Wi-Fi, not having tempting food in the house, or blocking access to distracting sounds, thereby preventing the need for constant self-control.
To encourage positive behaviors, make them as easy and automatic as possible by placing cues in your environment, like having your workout shoes out or your gratitude journal visible, so your brain is prompted to act.
If you cannot remove a temptation, physically restrain yourself from acting on it, such as tying yourself to a mast to hear tempting music without jumping overboard, or putting your phone in a Ziploc bag to prevent touching it.
When in the presence of temptations that cannot be removed, actively keep your attention away from them, as this is the second-best strategy after complete avoidance to prevent succumbing to desires.
To control the ‘spirit horse’ (drives for honor and social interaction), cultivate habits that make desired behaviors natural and pleasurable over time, rather than relying on constant conscious effort.
Train your ‘spirit horse’ by making desired actions familiar and enjoyable; as you get good at something, you take pleasure in doing it, which co-opts its energy to pull you in the right direction.
Create regular routines for social interactions, such as a daily family dinner, to make spending time with loved ones automatic and enjoyable, strengthening connections without conscious decision-making.
Regularly write in a gratitude journal to foster connection and pleasure, thereby training your ‘spirit horse’ to naturally engage in reflective practices that contribute to well-being.
Actively control how you represent the world to yourself by framing situations as either in or out of your control, and decide whether to let external factors bother you, as this mental frame can become self-fulfilling.
Recognize that willpower alone is often insufficient to control strong appetites; it should be used only in the most difficult situations where other strategies of avoidance or distraction are not possible.