Actively share or write about deeply troubling or traumatic experiences, especially those you’ve kept secret, to process them, make sense of them, and reduce their negative impact on mental and physical health.
When writing about painful experiences, aim to structure them with a beginning, middle, and end. This organization helps you understand the event and yourself better, fostering personal growth.
Instead of trying to shut off or avoid negative emotions as they arise, practice feeling and accepting them immediately. This prevents a stronger physiological rebound and helps achieve a calmer state.
When an emotion is triggered, shift your focus from the narrative or story behind it to the pure, felt physical sensation of that emotion in your body. This technique aids in managing and working with emotions.
Recognize that while initial painful events (the “first arrow”) are often unavoidable, your subsequent emotional reaction to them (the “second arrow”) is optional and within your control. This awareness helps prevent additional suffering.
Openly admit and disclose personal struggles or “shameful secrets” to others. This frees your mind from the cognitive burden of concealment, allowing more mental energy for improvement and better performance.
When performing a task, avoid telling yourself what not to do (e.g., “don’t miss the shot”). This ironically makes the unwanted action more likely to occur due to ironic processes.