Recognize that while life is inherently stressful, you have the power to change how you respond to stress, rather than being controlled by it.
Consciously shift from a ‘stress is debilitating’ mindset to a ‘stress is enhancing’ mindset, understanding that not all stress is bad and can improve performance.
When experiencing physiological signs of stress (e.g., racing heart, sweaty hands), tell yourself that this is your body preparing to act and perform better, viewing it as an ally rather than a threat.
Repeatedly ask yourself ‘why am I stressed?’ to uncover the underlying values or purpose you care about; connecting to this deeper meaning can deflate stress and bring clarity.
Recognize when the drive for constant accomplishment and perfection is no longer serving your well-being, and instead focus on simply being present and authentic.
Identify and gently set aside ’loyal soldier’ patterns or outdated coping mechanisms (e.g., gold star seeking, bully/be bullied mode) that once served you but are no longer functional.
Invest effort in truly understanding your personal stress and its origins, as this deep self-knowledge can lead to a lighter and more liberated way of living.
Dedicate time to yourself, even if just a minute, to reflect your self-worth, as this investment can provide more energy and a sense of peace for other aspects of your life.
Allow yourself to experience and express the full spectrum of human emotions, including vulnerability and sadness, rather than only focusing on strength and resilience.
Actively work to understand and feel the full range of your emotions, rather than suppressing them, to gain deeper self-awareness and personal growth.
Be present with bodily sensations and emotions to uncover and process repressed grief, whether it’s personal (like miscarriage) or generational, by learning more about family history.
Through consistent practice, cultivate greater presence and awareness in daily life, allowing you to observe reactions and understand their deeper origins before responding.
To start meditating, sit, close your eyes, and try to breathe for five minutes a day; schedule it in your calendar to ensure consistency.
Before engaging in intensive meditation, practice sitting and breathing for gradually longer periods (e.g., an hour every now and then) to build stamina and presence.
When meditating, acknowledge that your mind will wander and experience various thoughts and sensations; recognize this as a normal part of the process and simply sit with it.
If traditional sitting meditation is difficult, try tonal meditation by vocalizing a vowel with your breath to connect with bodily sensations and find a practice that resonates.
If you feel a strong need for dedicated time and space for your meditation practice, consider attending a retreat to deepen your experience and focus.
Give yourself a break by accepting that some days you might only meditate for 2-10 minutes, while other days you can dedicate more time, to maintain consistency without self-criticism.
Conduct a ‘dry-eyed, skillful, holistic’ review of your daily schedule to identify pockets of time, perhaps by reducing social media or TV, that can be dedicated to meditation practice.
When facing stress, recall previous situations where you thrived under distress or overcame panic, as remembering these successes can empower you to push through current challenges.
Reflect on patterns and habits learned from your parents and family to discern which are healthy and which are no longer serving you, allowing you to drop unhealthy ones.
Actively notice the demographic makeup of any environment you enter (e.g., number of people from different backgrounds) to increase your awareness of diversity and your own exposure to it.
Pay attention to your physiological responses (e.g., heart rate, nervousness) when interacting with people different from you, and then interrogate the ‘why’ to address unconscious biases and promote equal treatment.
Instead of believing you are perfectly ‘good,’ adopt a ‘good-ish’ mindset that allows for a growth-oriented view of your mistakes and biases, making you less defensive and more open to learning.
By being aware of the diversity in a room, you may be more likely to initiate conversations with people who look different from you, fostering new connections and understanding.
Participate in unconscious bias training to increase awareness of societal stereotypes and expectations that everyone holds, which can help in making different choices in behavior.
Engage in virtual reality training that measures physiological responses in real-world simulations to reveal and adjust biases, preventing real-world mistakes.
If predisposed to depression and experiencing a negative mood, channel that energy into creative projects as a form of mood repair to shift towards a more positive state.
Adopt a ‘stress is enhancing’ mindset when stressed to boost creativity, allowing you to see connections between things more clearly and generate new ideas.
When stuck on a creative task, strategically switch to a similar task for a period, as this can help you get unstuck and generate new ideas by breaking fixation.
When you find yourself ruminating or worrying excessively, especially about interpersonal conflict, ask yourself ‘Is this useful?’ to determine if your thoughts are constructive or merely degrading your well-being.
After a conflict, engage in constructive thinking by asking how you can communicate better, the best way to address the issue with the person, and what moves are best if you want to repair the relationship.
Improve communication and prevent conflict by being a clearer communicator of your internal state, practicing skillful vulnerability by openly sharing your feelings and the stories you’re telling yourself.
Recognize there’s no single ‘right’ way to meditate; instead, get to know yourself and create a personalized ‘mosaic’ of different techniques that best support your well-being.