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Sitting with Chaos | Zenju Earthlyn Manuel

Oct 11, 2021 51m 54s 28 insights
<p>Very few of us relish chaos and disruption, but they are facts of life, given the nonnegotiable nature of change. In this episode with Zenju Earthlyn Manuel, we're going to talk about how to tune into the value of disruption, and learn how to sit with the chaos. </p> <p> </p> <p>Zenju Earthlyn Manuel is an ordained Zen priest, holds a Ph.D., and worked for decades as a social science researcher and development director for non-profit organizations. She is also a prolific author.</p> <p> </p> <p>In this conversation we'll explore: what to do with the unknown and not having any answers; the power of a "sip of silence" (her term); what she means by the phrase "death as a doorway to tenderness;" how she defines tenderness - a word that can easily get bogged down in sloppy sentimentality; and what she meant when she wrote "I'm not advocating love as an answer to all of the ills of the world. Then again, it is just that simple to be love."</p> <p> </p> <p><em>Content Warning: There are brief mentions of assault; spiritual, sexual, and substance abuse; and racism, including a recent incident Zenju experienced herself. </em></p> <p> </p> <p> </p>
Actionable Insights

1. Value Disruption for Transformation

Recognize that transformation happens in the midst of messiness and disruption, viewing these periods as dynamic movements that can lead to internal and external change.

2. Allow Disruption to Change You

Instead of resisting disruptions, allow them to change you, as forcing against them can prevent transformation and keep you stuck in old patterns.

3. Transform Suffering into Contribution

Utilize your experiences of turmoil and suffering as ‘mud for the lotus flower,’ recognizing that these difficulties can be used to contribute to society and fuel personal growth.

4. Engage with Life’s Troubles

Instead of trying to fix all of life’s troubles to create a perfect existence, engage with and utilize the inherent difficulties of living as part of the experience.

5. Practice Continuous Rediscovery

Approach interactions and experiences with a mindset of continuous discovery, recognizing that even familiar people or ideas require rediscovery each time.

6. Embrace the Unknown

Cultivate an appreciation for the beauty and sacredness of the unknown aspects of life, viewing them as opportunities for discovery rather than dilemmas.

7. Adopt a Beginner’s Mind

Revisit familiar concepts, people, or ideas with a ‘beginner’s mind,’ allowing new insights and perspectives to emerge, even if you think you already know them.

8. Cultivate Daily Gentleness

Strive to hone a sense of gentleness and softness in daily life, similar to the profound openness experienced when witnessing death, to engage with the world from a more tender place.

9. Action from Open Heart

When taking action, ensure it stems from an open, sacred, and deliberate place that opens your heart, allowing for both gentleness and strength.

10. Return to Heart Consciousness

Use practices like breath, song, meditation, chanting, and stillness to consistently bring yourself back to your heart consciousness and stay connected to the earth.

11. Practice Non-Judgmental Presence

Practice ‘being love’ by engaging in the direct experience of the world every moment without judgment, the need to be an expert, or the urge to fix things, embracing a state of not knowing.

12. Learn Non-Judgment from Babies

Practice observing babies as they look around, aiming to develop a similar way of seeing – without judgment, expertise, or the need to know anything.

13. Begin Meditation Slowly

If new to meditation, especially during chaos, start with very short periods, like one or two minutes of sitting still to breathe, as your system is accustomed to its current way of dealing with chaos.

14. Short Breathing Breaks

Take one or two minutes to simply breathe in and out, as this brief pause can change the tone of your subsequent engagements with the world.

15. Daily Sips of Silence

Incorporate ‘sips of silence’ throughout your day, pausing whenever possible for a minute or two, allowing phone calls and texts to wait.

16. Pause from Information Overload

Periodically disengage from news and ongoing conversations, even for a minute or two, to create a moment of quiet and reset your engagement with the world.

17. Breathe with Fear

When fear arises, simply note its presence and take a few breaths with it, treating it like a temporary visitor rather than immediately analyzing or trying to get rid of it.

18. Process Sensations Bodily

When experiencing strong physical sensations related to difficult events, allow them to process within your body through breath and stillness, rather than immediately intellectualizing them in your mind.

19. Breathe Through Difficult Sensations

Practice breathing with difficult or ancestral sensations in your body to allow them to process without causing harm, fostering stillness and self-care.

20. Follow Your Body’s Guidance

Cultivate awareness of what’s happening in your body and allow it to guide you, rather than solely relying on intellectual analysis.

21. Acknowledge Fear Without Analysis

When fear arises, simply note its presence and take a few breaths with it, treating it like a temporary visitor rather than immediately analyzing or trying to get rid of it.

22. Momentary Presence with Pain

Practice being present with pain and suffering in the moment, even if only for a brief period, to engage with your current experience.

23. Face Tenderness Directly

Instead of trying to escape feelings of tenderness or vulnerability through various forms of abuse, learn to be present with these emotions.

24. Address Internal Wounds Directly

To truly heal internal wounds, engage directly with them rather than externalizing the problem onto others, which prevents personal transformation.

25. Embrace Confusing Transformation

When undergoing personal transformation, especially with tenderness, allow the process to unfold even if it’s confusing, and avoid letting the analytical mind interfere with the experience.

26. Pause for Integration

Allow for integration of new understandings by pausing and engaging in the process of discovery, rather than rushing to conclusions.

27. Thoughtful Response to Injustice

When faced with injustice, consider a thoughtful and measured response, such as writing a letter, rather than immediately crumbling or reacting with overwhelming anger.

28. Consult Professionals for Calm

Consider using teas, herbs, or other professional help from a trusted herbalist or doctor to calm your nervous system during times of trouble and turmoil.