Learn to make friends with your mind through meditation, presence, and loving kindness, recognizing it doesn’t have to be an enemy but can become a friend, leading to more peace.
Instead of pushing away thoughts or ideas considered negative or destructive, accept them, as this makes them less powerful and allows for a letting go, rather than feeding them through struggle.
Understand that accepting the current state of things (e.g., inequality, personal limitations) does not mean being at peace with it indefinitely; it means acknowledging reality to work towards change from a place of wisdom and compassion, rather than anger.
Approach social justice issues from a place of compassion rather than abiding anger, as compassion is a more effective and resilient long-term strategy for attacking problems and helping those affected.
Extend the practice of loving kindness beyond meditation to actively embody it in political acts, social media interactions, and television appearances, considering what it means to act through kindness in the world.
Instead of solely blaming others for hate and tribalism, take ownership of your own imperfections, unconscious biases, and contributions to the problem, as this is a constructive way to initiate conversations and find solutions.
When engaging in conversations with those you disagree with, begin by acknowledging your own mistakes or biases (e.g., “my unconscious racial bias”) rather than attacking or pointing fingers, to prevent rational thinking from shutting down and to foster genuine dialogue.
Adopt the mindset that “no one is the worst thing they’ve ever done” and act as though people are redeemable, giving them the opportunity to be their best selves, rather than condemning them to the worst version you perceive.
Implement “connection policies” and individual actions that increase interaction across different groups (e.g., racially integrated schools, interfaith programs) because it is “hard to hate up close” and such connections reduce unconscious bias.
When people are trying to change, grow, or overcome injustices, recognize that the path is not straight or smooth; extend generosity and grace to them, creating opportunities for learning rather than “voting them off the island.”
Be open about your own mistakes, hurtful actions, or problematic thoughts, and be willing to learn and grow from public scrutiny or “call-outs,” viewing these as opportunities for improvement rather than just condemnation.
Striving to feel a certain way (e.g., relaxed, calm) during meditation almost guarantees you won’t feel that way, as the goal is to feel whatever you’re feeling clearly so feelings don’t own you.
Tune into “just a hair north of neutral” pleasant sensations, like the feeling of your breath, without forcing it, as there are moments when meditation can be pleasant.
Recognize that getting distracted and returning attention to your breath is the essence of meditation; beating yourself up for distractions is counterproductive and prevents enjoyment.
Identify your recurring inner neurotic programs (e.g., planner, anger, work-thinker, rusher) and greet them with “Welcome to the party” before returning to your breath, which can make the practice more cheerful and less grim.
Start your meditation with a phrase like “May all beings everywhere be free from suffering” to pull yourself out of selfish concerns and create better inner weather for the practice.
At the end of meditation, mentally dedicate any positive benefits generated to “everybody” or “all beings,” which is a useful exercise to generate the wish to give away benefits, even if it feels cheesy.