Engage in acts of caring for others, as the act of caring itself produces and deepens love in relationships, rather than love being a prerequisite for care.
If genuine feelings of care are low, actively ‘pretend to care’ by initiating conversations, asking for advice, and treating loved ones as important humans; this can transform the dynamic and lead to authentic love.
Imagine your own funeral and write your eulogy, focusing on how you want to be remembered for your relationships and positive impact on others, rather than professional achievements, to clarify what truly matters in life.
Embrace giving to others and your community, recognizing it as a deeply fulfilling and ‘selfish’ act in terms of personal satisfaction.
Prioritize and practice kindness in your interactions, understanding it as the highest form of intelligence and the most effective way to positively impact the world.
Actively create clear boundaries and ‘bifurcate the real estate’ between work and non-work activities, even if work feels purposeful, to prevent working 100% of the time and improve work-life balance.
Intentionally seek out and embrace ’nothingness’ or passive time to simply ‘be,’ allowing for unstructured, unpurposeful moments of enjoyment and presence, like a child in flow.
Utilize mindfulness to prevent your mind from continuing to ‘work’ or be distracted when engaged in non-work activities, allowing for full presence with loved ones.
Proactively ask important questions of loved ones today, especially parents, about life, retirement, and aging, to avoid future regret before it’s too late.
Focus on enjoying the process and the present moment in your work and life journey, rather than solely fixating on future goals or ’the top of the mountain,’ which may not bring lasting happiness.
Structure projects and endeavors in a way that ensures they provide personal growth, strengthen relationships, and offer fulfillment, regardless of their external success or longevity.
Be less self-critical about struggles with forming new healthy habits, understanding that habit formation is inherently difficult for almost everyone.
When sensing an argument is brewing, internally repeat the mantra ‘create a safe space’ to remind yourself to reassure your partner you are on their side, leading to better outcomes.
In arguments, consider apologizing even if you don’t initially feel you are in the wrong, as this can de-escalate the situation, elicit a softer reaction from your partner, and lead to a positive resolution.
During arguments, reflect on your true motivations and recognize when the desire for ’total victory’ (driven by ego) is unproductive and detrimental to the relationship.
Utilize couples therapy to address relationship challenges, recognizing it as a valuable tool for progress and a way to normalize seeking help.
Seek opportunities, like seeing loved ones as ‘characters’ in a story, to gain a detached, third-party perspective on them, which can reveal their strengths and foster deeper appreciation.
Actively resist the modern tendency to view caring for aging parents as a burden, recognizing their prior investment and the opportunity to deepen the relationship.
Actively work towards making all your relationships the ‘best version of themselves,’ rather than merely fulfilling a role or maintaining the status quo.