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Imposter Syndrome, Politics and Sensuality, Dr. Jay Michaelson

Apr 10, 2019 1h 22m 42 insights
Our guest this week, Jay Michaelson, wears many hats. He is the author of six books and over three hundred articles on religion, sexuality, law, and contemplative practice. He is a columnist for The Daily Beast and is a frequent commentator on NPR and MSNBC. In his 'other' career, Jay is an affiliated assistant professor at Chicago Theological Seminary, teaches meditation in Jewish and Theravadan Buddhist lineages, and holds nondenominational rabbinic ordination. And for a decade, he was a professional LGBT activist. Michaelson also holds the special title of Chief Editor in Wisdom Content on the 10% Happier app. Our conversation touches many topics from the overlap of politics and spirituality, to the usefulness of meditation as the parent of a toddler. ***Please vote for your favorite Health & Wellness podcast in the 23rd Annual Webby Awards. Vote Here: http://bit.ly/10webby The Plug Zone Website: https://www.jaymichaelson.net/ Books: https://www.jaymichaelson.net/books/ Twitter: @jaymichaelson
Actionable Insights

1. Integrate Practice with Worldly Life

Actively seek ways to integrate serious contemplative practice with the demands and responsibilities of living in the world, allowing the interplay to be constantly new and evolving.

2. Embrace Skepticism in Buddhism

Maintain a skeptical approach to Buddhist concepts, as the Buddha himself encouraged personal investigation rather than blind faith, especially regarding metaphysical claims.

3. Practice Buddhism as “Doing”

Approach Buddhism as a practical “doing” rather than a system of beliefs, aligning with the Buddha’s encouragement to “check it out for yourself” rather than blindly believing.

4. Engage in Contemplative Practices for Species’ Survival

Dedicate energy to contemplative practices like meditation, viewing them as crucial tools to diminish root causes of greed, hatred, delusion, ignorance, and fear, thereby contributing to the long-term viability of the species.

5. Remember Impermanence

Recall the principle of impermanence, recognizing that whatever difficult experience or emotion you are currently facing will eventually pass.

6. Mindfully Investigate Urges

If you decide that an urge (like to veg out) is not the right move, mindfully investigate its arising, along with any fatigue or frustration, to observe that it will pass.

7. Cultivate Empathy for Politics

Wake up to more empathy, as this practice can lead to positive political consequences and make it harder to ignore oppression.

8. Use Mindfulness for Tactical Responses

Cultivate mindfulness to create “spaciousness in the mind” during stressful interactions, enabling you to respond tactically and compassionately rather than react impulsively.

9. Prioritize Self-Care for Activism

Engage in self-care and maintenance practices to recharge, which is necessary for sustained activist work and responsible engagement in the world.

10. Practice Self-Care for Others

If you have the privilege of being able to “unplug” or practice self-care, use this opportunity responsibly to maintain your well-being so you can better support those who lack such luxuries.

11. Regulate News/Social Media Exposure

Consciously regulate your exposure to news and social media, knowing when not to click, to maintain health and sanity, which enables you to better support those without that luxury.

12. Engage in Cross-Political Conversations

Engage in conversations with people holding opposing political views, aiming for “accurate disagreement” rather than trying to change their minds.

13. Foster Human Connection in Debates

Focus on fostering human connection and understanding people’s humanity, as this is often more effective in shifting perspectives than presenting facts alone.

14. Check Self-Interest in Politics

Regularly examine how personal interests and desires might create blindness or make it harder to hold certain political views, especially when advocating for policies that benefit oneself.

15. Be Aware of Your Neuroses

Cultivate awareness of your own neuroses and anxieties, as this self-awareness can prevent them from negatively impacting your children.

16. Observe Mental “Propuncia”

Recognize and observe the “phantasmagoric movies” your mind creates from present-moment data points, which often project awful future scenarios, especially as a parent.

17. Take Time Out When Angry

When anger or intense frustration arises, especially with children, take a moment to step away and take time out before reacting.

18. Practice Self-Care as a Parent

Engage in self-care or mindfulness practices as a parent to better navigate the many opportunities for disagreement and stress that arise in the parenting journey.

19. See Anger as Conditions

When anger arises, view it as a “hurricane” created by conditions, rather than a fixed entity, and “get out of the way” to prevent escalation.

20. Cherish Every Moment with Children

Actively cherish and enjoy every moment with your children, as this common advice is genuinely valuable and time with them passes quickly.

21. Teach Kids Awareness, Not Formal Mindfulness

Focus on teaching children to be aware, awake, mindful, present-moment focused, and aware of their emotions, rather than formal mindfulness practices.

22. Enrich Sensual Life with Meditation

Practice meditation to become more awake, aware, and mindful, which can lead to a richer sensual life, including better relationships, intimacy, delight in music, art, and food.

23. Practice Eating Meditation

Engage in eating meditation to fully experience and appreciate each bite of a meal, enhancing delight in food.

24. Acknowledge Growth in Practice

When feeling like an “imposter” in a practice like meditation, acknowledge your personal growth and progress from where you started, recognizing its value to others.

25. Don’t Claim Full Enlightenment

Avoid claiming full enlightenment, as being “still on the path” can be a valuable and relatable quality for those you teach or influence.

26. Reduce Unskillful Engagement by 10%

Strive for at least 10% less unskillful engagement in arguments and conflicts, as even small improvements in response can lead to better outcomes.

27. Observe Compulsive Consumption

Use meditation to develop the ability to recognize when you’re engaging in unconstructive, compulsive consumption of social media or entertainment, and then adjust your behavior.

28. Allow Entertainment Post-Meditation

It’s perfectly fine to watch Netflix or engage in other forms of entertainment after meditating; being a meditator doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy leisure.

29. Engage with Practice’s Intellectual Side

Connect with the intellectual infrastructure of your meditation practice to stay engaged and find inspiration, especially when sitting feels “dumb” or repetitive.

30. Work for Future Generations

Engage in work or practices whose full benefits may not be realized in your lifetime, with the hope that future generations will reap the rewards, like an old man planting a tree for his grandson.

31. Embrace and Affirm Sadness

Move beyond a clinical approach to negative emotions by lyrically embracing and profoundly affirming the sadness experienced daily when attuned to life’s ups and downs.

32. Live Fully Before Parenthood

Live a full life before becoming a parent to reduce FOMO and foster a greater appreciation for mundane moments with children, seeing them as the best possible use of time.

33. Avoid Exploiting Children for Content

Resist the temptation to turn your children into “material” for writing or content creation, as it can be liberating and allow for more pure presence.

34. Correct Misinformation in Your Circle

In your closed circle, correct misinformation (e.g., about immigrant crime rates) or challenge nasty memes, even if it’s just by noting it and not being okay with it.

35. Communicate Mindfulness Deeply

Strive to communicate the deeper, transformative benefits of contemplative practice in a way that is accessible to a wide audience, beyond just “chilling out.”

36. Read Intro to Buddhism Books

To learn more about Buddhism from a skeptical, practical perspective, read “Buddhism Without Beliefs” by Stephen Batchelor and “Why Buddhism is True” by Robert Wright.

37. Read Jay Michelson’s Books

Explore Jay Michelson’s books “Evolving Dharma” for insights on meditation and the next generation of enlightenment, and “Gate of Tears” for a lyrical embrace of everyday sadness and spiritual attunement.

38. Use the 10% Happier App for Short Wisdom Talks

Utilize the “Talks” feature on the 10% Happier app for 5-10 minute wisdom zaps, consumable during daily activities like brushing teeth or walking.

39. Sign Up for Meditation Weekly

Sign up for the free “Meditation Weekly” newsletter at 10percenthappier.com/blog to receive excellent content from Jay Michelson.

40. Pre-order “10% Happier” Book

Pre-order the 5th anniversary edition of the “10% Happier” book at hc.com/happier to get new guided meditations and free audio versions on the app.

41. Vote for 10% Happier Webby

Vote for 10% Happier for the Webby Award by clicking the link in the show notes or visiting 10percenthappier.com; it takes only 30 seconds.

42. Rate/Review the Podcast

Support the podcast by rating or reviewing it on your podcast platform and by talking about it on social media.