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How to Suffer Well | Brother Pháp Dung

Mar 21, 2022 1h 3m 21 insights
<p><strong>New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.</strong></p> <p>--</p> <p>In January 2022, <a href="https://plumvillage.org/about/thich-nhat-hanh/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Thich Nhat Hanh</a>, the Vietnamese Zen master, peace activist, poet, and author passed away. He was the founder of the <a href="https://plumvillage.org/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">International Plum Village Community of Engaged Buddhism</a>. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. called him "an Apostle of peace and nonviolence" when nominating him for the Nobel Peace Prize. Thousands of people came out for his funeral.   </p> <p><br /></p> <p>Brother Pháp Dung is making his second appearance on the show to talk about Thich Nhat Hanh. If you missed it <a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brother-phap-dung-320" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">last time</a> he was on, Brother Pháp Dung has an incredible personal story. He was born in Vietnam in 1969 and came to the US at the age of nine. He worked as an architect/designer for four years before becoming a monk. He was very close personally with Thich Nhat Hanh, who he refers to as "Thây," or teacher, and is now a Dharma teacher himself in Thich Nhat Hanh's Plum Village tradition.</p> <p><br /></p> <p>This episode explores:</p> <ul> <li>The life of Thich Nhat Hanh: his path to Buddhism in the 1960's and his exile from Vietnam for opposing the war.</li> <li>The meaning of "wrong view" or wrong perception. </li> <li>What non-separation and inter-being is. </li> <li>Thich Nhat Hanh's view that birth and death are only notions.</li> <li>Grief, and why learning how to suffer will help you suffer less.</li> </ul> <p><br /></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Full Shownotes:</strong> <a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brother-phap-dung-432</a></p> <p><br /></p>
Actionable Insights

1. Embrace Interbeing as Medicine

Cultivate the concept of “interbeing” by recognizing that others’ suffering and happiness are intrinsically linked to your own, using this as a profound “medicine for individualism.”

2. Challenge Wrong Perception & Doubt

Regularly recheck your perceptions and views by asking the mantra “Are you sure? Am I sure?” Cultivate a little doubt to stay open to investigation and avoid being locked into fixed ideas, as wrong perception is the origin of suffering.

3. Practice Self-Care for Connection

Prioritize self-care and become “whole” to create inner space, which allows for greater openness, listening, and the natural unfolding of interconnection with others.

4. Learn to Suffer Well

Acknowledge and practice with your suffering, understanding that learning “how to suffer well” will ultimately lead to less suffering and allow for authentic emotional expression.

5. Cultivate Inner Contentment

Work on finding true inner contentment to prevent the internal “war” that leads to blaming others, scapegoating, and creating enemies.

6. Simplify Life & Reorient Priorities

Actively simplify your life by reorienting your focus on what truly matters, rather than being constantly busy or accumulating things out of dissatisfaction, which creates more time and mental space.

7. Build Supportive Community (Sangha)

Actively seek out and build a supportive community and friendships (sangha), as this is crucial for navigating life’s challenges, balancing individualism, and providing a space for connection and growth.

8. Integrate Contemplation & Action

Integrate contemplative practices (meditation) with active service to help others, especially in times of suffering, and remember to revive oneself through contemplation to maintain sustainability and resilience.

9. Reframe Birth and Death

Reframe your understanding of birth and death as continuous cycles of manifestation and transformation, rather than fixed, absolute points, recognizing that existence continues beyond physical form through creations and memories.

10. Use Concepts as Tools

Utilize spiritual concepts (like interbeing) not as mere intellectual descriptions, but as tools or “keys” to hold and look deeply into your world, yourself, and the reality of how things work.

11. Practice Mindfulness as Remembering

Understand and practice mindfulness as “remembering” – remembering your true self, your continuation, and the gratitude for being alive – rather than being forgetful and caught in thoughts or concepts.

12. Observe Cycles for Healing

Observe cycles, seasons, and continuation in nature (trees, mountains) and in human relationships (ancestors, siblings) as a healing practice to gain a bigger picture perspective.

13. Counterbalance Sadness with Caring

During times of sadness or grief, actively counterbalance the tendency to retreat or focus solely on sadness by finding ways to continue caring for others, nature, or meaningful projects.

14. Practice Compassion While Driving

Practice compassion and non-separation even in stressful situations like driving by acknowledging others’ hurriedness or anger, allowing them space, and consciously choosing not to harbor hate or frustration.

15. Recognize Multiple Truths in Conflict

When observing conflicts, cultivate the understanding that “both sides can be right,” avoiding the need to declare one party definitively correct, especially when not self-interested in the situation.

16. Humanize Spiritual Practices

Approach spiritual practices and teachings in a humanized way, avoiding idolization or turning them into rigid, external “things” or dogmas.

17. Seek ‘Enough’ for Happiness

Shift your mindset from constantly seeking “more” to recognizing “enough,” which will create more time and mental space, leading to a clearer understanding of real happiness.

18. Prepare for Difficult Times

Prepare for difficult emotional “winters” by gathering “wood” (spiritual practices, self-care, community) during easier times, so you are resilient when challenges arise.

19. Practice Generosity and Service

Engage in practices of generosity (Dana), offering service, and helping the less fortunate as a counterbalance to materialism and individualism.

20. Advocate for Urban Community Centers

Support or envision the creation of community centers in urban environments that foster connection, self-reflection, and spiritual growth, similar to exercise or yoga gyms.

21. Enjoy Life Beyond Work

Recognize that life is more than just working; make time to enjoy your life and nourish your human and spiritual aspects before it’s too late.