← 10% Happier with Dan Harris

Goldie Hawn On: "Brain Breaks," Curiosity, And How To Make A Romantic Relationship Last For 30 Years

Aug 5, 2024 1h 3m 24 insights
<p><em>New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.</em></p> <p><br /></p> <p>Don't be fooled by the bubbly public persona.</p> <p><br /></p> <p>Goldie Hawn is an Academy Award winning actress, producer, director, and best-selling author. She's written two best-selling books, a memoir called <em>A Lotus Grows in the Mud</em> and then, more recently, <em>10 Mindful Minutes</em>, which is for kids and parents. She is also the Founder of <a href="https://mindup.org/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">MindUP</a>, a charity that equips children with mental fitness.</p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>In this episode we talk about:</strong></p> <ul> <li>How she got interested in meditation — a story that, like Dan's, involves panic attacks</li> <li>The power of curiosity </li> <li>What she means when she talks about God</li> <li>What it means to take a "brain break"</li> <li>Why jealousy has never really been part of her repertoire</li> <li>And how to make a romantic relationship last.</li> </ul> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Related Episodes:</strong></p> <p><a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/dalai-lama" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>How To Live A Happier Life | The Dalai Lama & Dr. Richard Davidson</strong></a></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Sign up for Dan's weekly newsletter</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3QtGRqJ" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>here</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Follow Dan on social:</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3tGigG5" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Instagram</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3FOA84J" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>TikTok</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Ten Percent Happier online</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/46TZglY" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>bookstore</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Subscribe to our</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3FybRzD" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>YouTube Channel</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Our favorite playlists on:</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3Qa8kMT" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Anxiety</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3MjtMxF" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Sleep</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3QvyA5J" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Relationships</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3QxZASc" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Most Popular Episodes</strong></a></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Full Shownotes:</strong> <a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/goldie-hawn</a></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Additional Resources:</strong></p> <ul> <li>Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: <a href="https://10percenthappier.app.link/install" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://10percenthappier.app.link/install</a></li> </ul> <p><br /></p>
Actionable Insights

1. Seek Professional Mental Health Help

If experiencing mental health challenges like panic attacks or depression, seek help from a psychologist or other professional to understand and address your condition, as Goldie Hawn did for nine years. This proactive step can lead to healing and self-discovery.

2. Explore Diverse Meditation Practices

Don’t limit yourself to one form of meditation; explore various traditions like Transcendental Meditation, Thomas Merton’s approaches, Sufism, or different Buddhist paths to find what resonates and deepens your understanding of mindfulness.

3. Use Meditation for Self-Examination

Engage in meditation to rise above your immediate self, allowing for deep self-examination of who you are and what you believe, which is crucial for personal growth and understanding.

4. Witness Behavior, Don’t Internalize

Practice witnessing others’ behavior and perceptions as if observing a Rorschach test, rather than internalizing them or letting them define you, recognizing that everyone has their own perspective and problems. This helps maintain your sense of self and prevents ego inflation.

5. Maintain Balanced External Validation View

Cultivate a level-headed view of external praise or criticism, understanding that public opinion can fluctuate, which allows you to remain grounded and not be swayed by others’ perceptions.

6. Combat Jealousy’s False Premise

Counter feelings of jealousy by recognizing the ’lie’ that someone else intercepted something meant for you; instead, understand that you were likely not part of that specific situation, which can alleviate unnecessary suffering.

7. Prioritize Honesty, Care in Relationships

Value and demand honesty and caring treatment from others, especially family, as these are fundamental principles that Goldie Hawn found worth getting angry about when violated, unlike minor transgressions.

8. Practice Saying “I’m Sorry”

Cultivate the ability to sincerely apologize, as it brings significant health, joy, and wisdom into your life and relationships.

9. Study Neuroscience for Brain Health

Learn about neuroscience to understand what happens in your brain during meditation and other experiences, as this cognitive engagement enhances the effectiveness of positive practices and promotes a healthy, balanced brain.

10. Practice Focused Imagery Meditation

Engage in focused imagery meditation, such as visualizing a specific figure with intricate detail, to clear your mind, achieve deep focus, and access feelings of profound joy and emotional release.

11. Practice Tonglen for Compassion

Perform Tonglen meditation by breathing in the sorrows and sickness of the world, then transforming that darkness into light within your heart and breathing it out as positivity, which refines your state of mind and fosters compassion.

12. Integrate Frequent Short Meditations

Instead of only long sessions, incorporate multiple short (e.g., 5-minute) meditation or ‘brain breaks’ several times throughout the day, as this habituates your brain to return to homeostasis more consistently.

13. Take Breaks During Stressful Moments

When feeling overwhelmed or stressed, even in social situations like dinner, step away for a brief, quiet break to calm yourself and regain composure.

14. Cultivate Self-Practice for Relationships

In romantic partnerships, prioritize your own meditative or self-awareness practice, not for your partner, but for yourself, as this can lead to greater clarity, compassion, forgiveness, and the ability to witness your partner’s perspective.

15. Maintain Individual Identity in Partnership

Recognize the importance of maintaining your separate identity and perspectives within a partnership, rather than trying to become your partner, which fosters tolerance and understanding.

16. Avoid Always Siding With Yourself

Adopt the mindset of ‘don’t side with yourself,’ being open to understanding others’ viewpoints without always defending your own, especially in contentious areas like religion or politics.

17. Consider Upbringing in Disagreements

When encountering differing perspectives, particularly in areas like politics, consider the other person’s upbringing to understand the roots of their views, fostering empathy rather than blame.

18. Cultivate Curiosity as Life Driver

Embrace curiosity to understand your own feelings and external phenomena, asking ‘why’ things happen, as this continuous search keeps life fascinating and drives personal growth.

19. Use Prayer/Intention for Healing

When facing dire situations, like a child’s illness, use prayer or focused intention by emptying yourself and asking to be a conduit for healing, believing in the power of energy and belief to influence outcomes.

20. Teach Kids Neuroscience-Based Mindfulness

Introduce children to neuroscience by teaching them about the emotional parts of their brain and how ‘brain breaks’ help them self-regulate emotions, fostering mental fitness from a young age.

21. Implement Short “Brain Breaks” for Kids

Encourage children to take ‘brain breaks’ three times a day for three minutes, explaining how this practice helps their amygdala calm down and their prefrontal cortex come online for better thinking and emotional management.

22. Model Mindfulness for Children

Parents should actively participate in mindfulness or ‘brain break’ practices with their children, modeling attentive listening and calm behavior, as children learn by mirroring their parents.

23. Simple Breathing, Chime for Kids

Guide children in simple breathing exercises (in and out through the nose) and use a chime, encouraging them to listen until the sound fades, as this helps quiet their minds and build focus.

24. Visit MindUp.org for Resources

Explore MindUp.org to learn more about neuroscience-based mindfulness programs for children, teachers, and school districts, and how to implement them for preventative mental health.