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Could This Practice Improve Your Sleep, Sharpen Your Mind, and Decrease Unhealthy Cravings? | Kelly Boys

Nov 30, 2022 1h 3m 14 insights
<p><em>New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers.</em></p> <p>---</p> <p>Today we're taking a run at something that is simultaneously a contemplative cliché and also a deeply desired psychological outcome: getting out of your head and into your body. So many of us want an escape route from the spinning, looping, fishing narratives and grudges in our head and our guest today has some very practical suggestions to help us do that. </p> <p><br /></p> <p>Kelly Boys is a mindfulness trainer and coach. She has helped design and deliver mindfulness and resilience programs for the UN, Google, and San Quentin State Prison. She is also the author of <a href="https://www.kellyboys.org/the-book" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><em>The Blind Spot Effect: How to Stop Missing What's Right in Front of You</em></a><em> </em></p> <p><br /></p> <p>Today we're going to talk specifically about a type of meditation that Kelly teaches called Yoga Nidra, which has been shown to help you sleep, improve your working memory, and decrease cravings. </p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>In this episode we talk about:</strong></p> <ul> <li>The difference between Yoga Nidra and mindfulness meditation, and how Kelly seeks to combine them</li> <li>The value of being able to both observe and high-five your demons </li> <li>Working with our "core beliefs" about ourselves and the world</li> <li>The calming power of drawing your attention to the back side of your body throughout the day</li> <li>Working with "opposites" as a way to get unstuck in difficult moments</li> <li>What Kelly means by the blind spot effect</li> <li>Setting intentions</li> </ul> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Full Shownotes:</strong> <a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kelly-boys-531" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/kelly-boys-531</a></p>
Actionable Insights

1. Interrogate & Ally Core Beliefs

Overhear recurring self-expressions or thoughts that stem from a core belief (e.g., ‘I’m not safe’ or ‘I’m a bad person’). Articulate it in one sentence, welcome it as a ‘part,’ and then ask what it wants or needs, and what action you can take to address it. This process helps uncover the root of misperceptions, transform limiting beliefs into allies, and change actions that stem from these unconscious drivers.

2. Engage Emotions as Inner Parts

When a recurring emotion (e.g., anger, anxiety) arises, personify it as a ‘part’ of yourself (e.g., an eight-year-old self) and actively engage with it. Ask what it needs or wants to integrate these aspects into your wholeness, preventing them from taking over or leading to misperceptions.

3. Develop Reliable Inner Resource

Identify a memory, natural place, or imagined space where you feel completely safe, secure, and at ease. Regularly connect with this image and its corresponding felt sense in your body, eventually focusing only on the bodily sensation. This practice builds a skill of accessing a baseline of ease and well-being, providing resilience and a quick way to downregulate the nervous system when triggered or facing challenges.

4. Regularly Set Heartfelt Intentions

Identify what is most important to you and set clear intentions around it, either daily (e.g., in the morning) or as a long-term ‘heartfelt intention.’ Regularly check in with how you are doing in relation to these intentions. This builds self-trust, promotes self-awareness, and drives behavior change, serving as a ‘North Star’ to guide your actions.

5. Cultivate Backside Body Awareness

Throughout the day, periodically bring your attention to the entire backside of your body (head, neck, back, legs) and allow a sense of rest to permeate your awareness. This simple practice helps to downregulate the nervous system, disrupt overthinking, and foster a sense of resting presence, cutting through mind illusions and promoting clearer perception.

6. Practice Holding Emotional Opposites

When stuck in a challenging emotion (e.g., disappointment), mentally ‘hold’ it in one hand and its opposite (e.g., satisfaction) in the other. Alternate attention between them, then try to hold both simultaneously. This practice helps to remind you of the full spectrum of experience, prevents fusion with one extreme, and can lead to relaxation or a ’third, more true insight,’ helping you get unstuck.

7. Practice Yoga Nidra Meditation

Engage in Yoga Nidra, a lying down guided meditation that has been shown to help you sleep better, improve working memory, and decrease cravings. Seek out mindfulness-based approaches for a practical and accessible experience, as these articulate the underlying mechanisms.

8. Use Yoga Nidra for Sleep

Practice Yoga Nidra specifically when trying to fall asleep, as it can be very effective for inducing sleep. If you fall asleep during the practice, it is considered perfectly fine and still beneficial.

9. Explore Physical Belief Correlates

When holding a belief or experiencing an emotion (e.g., in meditation or Yoga Nidra), actively look for and feel its physical manifestation or ‘correlate’ in your body. This somatic focus helps to understand how beliefs and emotions manifest physically.

10. Inquire Into Personal Blindspots

Reflect on patterns or behaviors in your life that create ‘messes’ or where you feel stuck, and actively inquire into how you might be unconsciously getting in your own way. This process illuminates misperceptions, helping to integrate different impulses and beliefs for greater wholeness and to ‘get out of your own way.’

11. Develop Compassion for Emotions

When difficult emotions arise, send them warmth and recognize that they might be trying to help you, rather than being something to be ashamed of or pushed away. This compassionate approach helps to integrate and understand these emotions, moving beyond fusion with them.

12. Embrace Yoga Nidra’s Receptive State

Approach Yoga Nidra with a sense of receptivity, allowing for a ‘conscious nap’ state rather than a strong feeling of ‘doing’ a practice. This state is powerful for working with the unconscious and allowing underlying drivers to emerge to the surface.

13. Yoga Nidra for Trauma Sensitivity

Engage in Yoga Nidra, noting its initial focus on establishing a sense of safety and ease in the body. This approach allows challenging experiences to be met within a context of safety and ease, making it particularly beneficial for trauma sensitivity.

14. Yoga Nidra for Dopamine, Memory

Practice Yoga Nidra (or other non-sleep deep rest practices) as research suggests it can help reset dopamine levels and improve working memory. This can help you move out of a ‘drive state’ and sharpen your mind.