Chodo and Koshin | Podcasts Distilled

Thinking about death can be supremely difficult. Many of us try not to think about it at all – until we have no choice. But two Zen Buddhist monks are using meditation, and a generous dose of humor, to show people that the dying process does not have to be scary, and can even be uplifting. Sensei Robert Chodo Campbell and Sensei Koshin Paley Ellison are the co-founders of the New York Center for Contemplative Care, and have trained doctors, nurses, hospice care workers, and social workers to incorporate meditation and caring into their bedside manner with patients, and in their relationships with loved ones. The duo also teaches people to embrace death's inevitability as push to live a fulfilling life – Zen Buddhist practice forces followers to look at this reality repeatedly – and how to treat a dying loved one with compassion instead of fear. Chodo and Kosin are the authors of the new book, "Awake at the Bedside: Teachings on Palliative & End of Life Care."

Actionable Insights

1. Confront Impermanence for Full Living

Radically reorient your life to confront the fact of impermanence and death, as avoiding this reality deprives you of living fully and being completely engaged in your life.

2. Practice Buddhism, Don’t Just Believe

Engage with Buddhism as a practice or something to ‘do,’ rather than just a belief system, to rigorously and repetitively confront the reality of impermanence and its personal application.

3. Shut Up and Listen to the Moment

Practice shutting up and listening to the present moment, letting go of past stories and focusing on what is happening now, as this moment is what’s important.

4. Meditate to Quiet Your Mind

Engage in meditation practice, even if initially difficult, to quiet a ‘crazy’ mind, reduce resistance to situations, and enable fuller, freer participation in life.

5. Cultivate Unconditional Love

Strive to love people fully, including all parts of them, not just the aspects you want or like, as this is a profound understanding of what it means to truly love someone.

6. Sit with Dying to Strip Veneer

Spend time sitting with dying and sick people to strip away societal veneers, gain extraordinary insight, and allow their awareness of limited days to profoundly change you.

7. Cultivate Present Relationships

Learn to be deeply engaged and present in relationships, taking in the whole environment and internal states, to foster intimacy with everyone you encounter.

8. Experience Life in Technicolor

Cultivate an awareness of life’s impermanence to bring each day into ’technicolor,’ prompting you to consider how you want to be in each moment.

9. Don’t Miss Opportunities to Love/Appreciate

Do not miss opportunities to love and appreciate, especially when confronting the reality of life’s brevity.

10. Be Present with Loved Ones

View your loved ones, especially family, through new eyes, recognizing their impermanence and experiencing them moment by moment, particularly after confronting suffering or death.

11. Engage in Service for Sobriety

Engage in a life of service to others, as it can help keep you sober, present, and aware of your good fortune, acting as a grounding force.

12. Turn Towards Your Fears

Actively turn towards and confront what is scary or your fears, as this process can be invigorating and lead to personal growth.

13. Prioritize People Over Devices

Re-evaluate your priorities, recognizing that human connection and presence, especially with children, are more important than distractions like cell phones.

14. Address Fading Interpersonal Connections

Recognize the decline in interpersonal relationships and communication in modern culture, prompting a need to re-engage more deeply with others.

15. Undertake Contemplative Care Training

Consider undertaking contemplative care training to learn how to care for people, integrate meditation, and face your fears around death and dying, potentially transforming your life.