Focus on your internal relationship with yourself as the core of wellness, rather than just external routines or eating habits. This deeper connection leads to overall better well-being.
When pursuing discipline in health or other areas, ensure your motivation stems from love, trust, and care for yourself, not from fear, self-hatred, or self-doubt, as self-flagellation does not lead to true freedom.
Deliberately try behaviors you’re ’not supposed to do’ (e.g., eating a whole bag of chips, over-exercising) while being fully present to understand what you like and dislike about them, and what underlying needs they attempt to meet. This experiential learning is crucial for true understanding.
Recognize that your body’s primal instincts, like the desire for comfort, are not suspicious but deep longings for safety that point towards self-compassion and an open heart. Listening to these instincts helps you develop a deeper trust in yourself.
Throughout the day, ask yourself, ‘How can I make my body a little bit more comfortable right now?’ This practice helps you tune into your body, make saner decisions about food and exercise, and stay present by noticing and releasing tension.
View any interruption to your established eating or exercise routine (e.g., bad weather, illness) not as an obstacle, but as a potential source of insight and an opportunity to adapt, grow, and explore what feelings arise.
Realize that even self-criticism is often an attempt to feel better by gaining control, and practice deep self-forgiveness for having felt responsible for every negative feeling or problem. This releases the burden of constant self-blame and fosters freedom.
Actively challenge the cultural narrative of youth and perfection by celebrating your current age and body, recognizing all it has done for you and the wisdom it embodies, rather than comparing it to past versions or external ideals.
Shift your perspective from judging your body based on appearance to appreciating the countless, intricate miracles it performs constantly, like the endocrine system or brain neurons, which operate beyond your conscious control.
Instead of scrutinizing your appearance in the mirror, use that time (e.g., while brushing teeth) to consciously think about and appreciate the many things your body does for you. This builds a habit of gratitude and positive self-talk.
During your shower, consciously touch each part of your body with care, appreciation, and love, transforming a routine task into a gesture of respect and connection with your physical self.
On a day when you’re on the fence about exercising, gently choose not to do your routine and instead, make a point of sitting or pausing to be present with the feelings (shame, anger, self-doubt) that arise from not exercising. This helps you confront and handle those emotions.
When you choose to skip exercise, actively sit with and observe the feelings that emerge without distraction, recognizing that you can handle them and that they don’t have to dictate your actions. This builds emotional resilience and freedom.
Understand that undoing lifelong conditioning doesn’t necessarily take an equally long time, and it’s okay to relax and not have a strict timeline for personal transformation. Be open to rapid shifts while also accepting a multi-year process.
Instead of forcing yourself into harsh changes, gently observe where there are natural openings to release old habits or embrace new ones, allowing yourself to feel safe in your current practices until a new opportunity for softening arises.
Recognize that even enlightened beings like the Buddha experienced physical ailments, and that meditation or a perfect mind-body relationship doesn’t guarantee the eradication of all physical problems. This removes an enormous pressure to achieve physical perfection through spiritual means.
Acknowledge that turning inward and connecting with your body can be challenging due to stored trauma, chronic pain, or discomfort. Approach this process with deep respect and appreciation for your willingness to try, understanding that difficulty is normal.
If full body awareness feels overwhelming, begin by focusing on just one part of your body, such as your feet on the floor. Even a momentary connection to one area is a significant step towards presence and self-connection.
When experiencing emotional triggers or difficulty staying present, focus on feeling and wiggling your fingertips or toes. This helps to down-regulate the nervous system and anchor you in the present moment without being in the ‘center of the storm.’
Understand that being in your body, even just feeling your feet on the floor, inherently brings you into the present moment, preventing you from being caught up in mental habits or abandoning yourself to overthinking.
Reject traditional Buddhist practices that focus on the body’s ‘disgusting’ aspects, as they can be harmful in a culture already prone to self-hatred. Instead, cultivate a practice of embracing, loving, and feeling completely at home in your body, trusting it for all its quirks and perceived faults.