Engage in meditation by paying very close attention to what is actually happening in the mind and body directly, rather than thinking about it conceptually, to explore your experience. This serves as a “lab component” to understand how the mind and body work.
Shift your strategy for organizing experience from a “self” view (“this is me, I am at stake”) to a “non-self” view (“this is not mine, this is not me”). This prevents evoking toxic emotions like greed and hatred, allowing for more positive emotions such as generosity and compassion.
Avoid taking internal commotions (thoughts, emotions) personally, as this prevents you from being “yanked around” by them and reduces suffering. When something feels impersonal, it doesn’t hurt as much.
Instead of saying “I’m feeling angry,” rephrase it as “I notice that anger is arising.” This shifts the emotion from driving your actions to becoming an observable object, allowing for different choices.
In moments of strong emotion, turn your attention inward and try to find “who” is feeling it. Realizing that the emotion isn’t as solid as you think can defuse its power and prevent regrettable actions.
When practicing mindfulness, pay attention to present moment experiences with an attitude of non-judgment, disengaging from wanting or not wanting things to be a certain way. This involves noticing aversion and letting go of it, regarding sensations with curiosity and interest rather than identification.
Through observation, recognize recurring patterns of cause and effect in your mind and body, such as irritability arising from lack of sleep. Understanding these patterns allows for distancing from identification and making different choices.
View retirement or mature years not as a time of diminishing expectations, but as an opportunity for spiritual investigation and understanding. This reframes a life stage for personal growth.
Apply the teachings and guidelines discussed to the “laboratory of your own life and your own mind” to test their utility and verify them in your personal experience.
Consider the “self” not as a fixed noun or entity, but as a verb – an event that occurs. When you are mindful, you are “not selfing,” which helps in disengaging from identification.