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A Star, Utterly Unguarded | Brett Eldredge

Oct 21, 2020 55m 15s 16 insights
We've backed away from celebrity interviews on the show of late, because we got a lot of feedback from listeners saying they had trouble relating to some of our more famous interviewees. I am confident that is not going to be the case with today's guest. Brett Eldredge may be a big country star -- with six #1 hits -- but he is no dilettante when it comes to tackling mental health challenges. You are about to listen to someone who is truly digging in and doing the work. By way of background, I have never personally been a country fan, but I first met Brett when he came on this show a few years ago to talk about his on-stage panic attacks and general anxiety, and after that we struck up a friendship. I have been so impressed by the rigor with which he has committed to his mental wellbeing. In this interview he really goes there -- speaking in utterly unguarded ways about how ambition and perfectionism have fueled his anxiety (as well as some of his romantic challenges); describing a special kind of therapy designed to address his panic attacks. Best of all, he told me enthusiastically that meditation and loosening up in general has greatly impacted his creativity, as evidenced by his new album Sunday Drive. Enjoy. Where to find Brett Eldredge online:  Website: https://www.bretteldredge.com/  Social Media: • Twitter: https://twitter.com/bretteldredge  • Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bretteldredge  • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bretteldredge/  • YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/BrettEldredge  Other Resources Mentioned: • Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World by Cal Newport: https://bookshop.org/books/digital-minimalism-choosing-a-focused-life-in-a-noisy-world/9780525536512  • Ten Percent Happier episode with Cal Newport on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/digital-minimalism-cal-newport/id1087147821?i=1000468718411   • Ten Percent Happier episode with Cal Newport on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6tfnjUGrszzqwR713hBGU2?si=OWWuDnizRrOmKvJPwQ2Xjg  • Who Ordered This Truckload of Dung?: Inspiring Stories for Welcoming Life's Difficulties by Ajahn Brahm: https://bookshop.org/books/who-ordered-this-truckload-of-dung-inspiring-stories-for-welcoming-life-s-difficulties/9780861712786  Additional Resources: • Ten Percent Happier Live: https://tenpercent.com/live • Coronavirus Sanity Guide: https://www.tenpercent.com/coronavirussanityguide • Free App access for Frontline Workers: https://tenpercent.com/care Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/brett-eldredge-293
Actionable Insights

1. Confront Perfectionism

Recognize perfectionism as a significant source of anxiety, stress, and a barrier in relationships. Embrace imperfections in all aspects of life, understanding that authenticity is more valued than flawless execution.

2. Disconnect from Digital Overload

Take a significant break from social media and digital devices (e.g., using a flip phone or limiting smart device use) to reduce external pressures, reconnect with your true self, and foster creativity. Consider exploring principles of Digital Minimalism.

3. Engage in Therapy

Seek professional therapy to address mental health challenges, gain awareness of triggers, and work through personal issues. This process is crucial for self-discovery and developing coping mechanisms.

4. Practice Exposure Therapy

Confront learned fears head-on through exposure therapy, which involves intentionally engaging in feared situations (e.g., simulated interviews for stage fright). This helps retrain the brain and reduce the power of anxiety.

5. Be Bold and Face Fears

Set a daily intention to ‘be bold’ and show up for challenging moments, even when scared. Define bravery as being scared and doing it anyway, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone to foster growth.

6. Combat Down Lulls with Activity & Connection

When experiencing feelings of loneliness or helplessness, force yourself out of isolation and get active. Engage with friends through phone calls or go on a hike, rather than stewing in negative emotions alone.

7. Get Out of Your Head

Actively shift your focus from internal rumination to engaging with your external life. This means participating in activities and connecting with the world around you instead of dwelling on negative thoughts.

8. Embrace Impermanence of Emotions

Remind yourself that difficult emotional states are temporary and will eventually pass. This understanding can provide hope and resilience during tough times, knowing that freedom from the feeling will come.

9. Nurture Relationships for Happiness

Prioritize and invest in the quality of your relationships, as they are a fundamental variable in overall happiness. Actively seek connection with others, even if you are naturally introverted, to avoid excessive isolation.

10. Cultivate Self-Love

Dedicate time to being with yourself and fostering self-love. Developing a strong sense of self and believing in your own worth is crucial before seeking deep romantic relationships or giving fully to others.

11. Prioritize Authentic Expression

In creative endeavors and personal interactions, prioritize authenticity and personal meaning over external validation or trends. Trust that genuine expression will resonate deeply with others.

12. Take Creative Risks

Be willing to take risks by expressing your unique self and vision, even if it deviates from what others expect or what is currently popular. Surround yourself with a supportive team that encourages this mission.

13. Ask ‘Is This Useful?’

When caught in a cycle of rumination, pause and ask yourself, ‘Is this useful?’ This question can help break the cycle of unproductive thinking and redirect your focus.

14. Maintain Consistent Meditation

Commit to a regular meditation practice (e.g., four to five days a week), even if you feel unsure about your technique. Experiment with different styles, like guided, unguided, or walking meditations, to find what works best for you.

15. Integrate Walking Meditation

Incorporate walking meditations into your routine, especially during hikes, to enhance awareness of your surroundings and connect more deeply with nature. Focus on sensory details like feeling your feet touch the ground.

16. Establish Nightly Wind-Down Routine

Create a consistent evening routine to prepare for sleep. This can include putting your phone in another room, drinking calming tea, and engaging in a relaxing activity like playing an instrument for 10-15 minutes.