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A Buddhist Antidote To Fear And Anxiety | Devin Berry

Jul 24, 2024 1h 7m 20 insights
<p><em>New episodes come out every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for free, with 1-week early access for Wondery+ subscribers</em></p> <p><em>---</em></p> <p>The two practices that helped turn this self described scowling, sarcastic skeptic into an expert meditator</p> <p>Since 1999, <a href="https://www.devinberry.org/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Devin Berry</a> has been a dedicated meditation practitioner, his practice is deeply rooted in the metta and vipassana teachings of the Insight Meditation tradition. He spent nearly five years in silent, intensive retreats, cultivating his practice and understanding. Devin is deeply committed to the personal and collective liberation of marginalized communities, believing that integrating reflection and insight leads to clarity and wisdom, which in turn fosters wise action.</p> <p>Devin is a dharma teacher at Spirit Rock and the Insight Meditation Society (IMS), where he serves as a guiding teacher. He also shares his teachings through Sounds True and at various sanghas and centers across the country.</p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>In this episode we talk about:</strong></p> <ul> <li>Why mindfulness alone is not enough</li> <li>How metta is part of four related mental skills, called the brahma viharas—and how to practice those</li> <li>The story of how and why the Buddha invented the Metta practice.</li> <li>The role and practice of Dana – generosity.</li> <li>Devin's year long Metta/Dana experiment </li> <li>And lastly, how these practices can help us on and off the cushion</li> </ul> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Related Episodes:</strong></p> <p><a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/sharon-salzberg-finding-your-way" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Sharon Salzberg Takes on the Cliches: Authenticity, Love, and Being Your Own BFF</a></p> <p><a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/mike-diamond-597" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Mike D On: The Value of Failure, the Addictive Power of Adrenaline, and How a Beastie Boy Got Into Lovingkindness</a></p> <p><a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/spring-washam-zev-borow" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Everything You Wanted To Know About Meditation Retreats But Were Afraid To Ask | Spring Washam (And Dan's Close Friend, Zev Borow)</a></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Sign up for Dan's weekly newsletter</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3QtGRqJ" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>here</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Follow Dan on social:</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3tGigG5" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Instagram</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3FOA84J" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>TikTok</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Ten Percent Happier online</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/46TZglY" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>bookstore</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Subscribe to our</strong> <a href="https://bit.ly/3FybRzD" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>YouTube Channel</strong></a></p> <p><strong>Our favorite playlists on:</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3Qa8kMT" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Anxiety</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3MjtMxF" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Sleep</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3QvyA5J" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Relationships</strong></a><strong>,</strong> <a href="https://spoti.fi/3QxZASc" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank"><strong>Most Popular Episodes</strong></a></p> <p><br /></p> <p><strong>Full Shownotes:</strong> <a href="https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/devin-berry" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/devin-berry</a></p>
Actionable Insights

1. Practice Loving Kindness (Metta)

Systematically envision a series of beings (people or animals) and send them good wishes using phrases like ‘May you be happy, may you be safe.’ This practice is an antidote to fear and can yield psychological, physiological, and behavioral benefits.

2. Cultivate All Four Brahma Viharas

Engage with the four ‘divine abodes’ – loving kindness (metta), compassion (karuna), sympathetic joy (mudita), and equanimity (upekka) – as interconnected qualities of the heart. Practicing these in concert helps open the heart and mind, even if not formally practiced individually.

3. Practice Generosity (Dana) & Service

Frame your life with gratitude and actively seek opportunities to help others, whether financially, through volunteering, or by offering your authentic self. This practice helps dissolve the sense of a separate ‘self’ and fosters a spirit of letting go.

4. Customize Metta Phrases

Create or customize Metta phrases that deeply resonate with you, rather than strictly adhering to classical ones. This helps you connect with the underlying feeling of goodwill, friendliness, and benevolence, making the practice more meaningful.

5. Initiate Metta with Joy

Begin your Metta practice by recalling something joyful or humorous to ‘prime the pump’ and reframe your mindset. This makes the practice feel less forced and more accessible, setting a positive tone.

6. Start Metta with Easy Beings

Begin your Metta rotation by visualizing ’easy’ beings like pets or loved ones, then move to yourself, mentors, neutral people, difficult people, and finally all beings. This builds a foundation of warmth before addressing more challenging targets.

7. Focus Metta on Non-Ill Will

Understand that the primary goal of Metta is not necessarily to feel soaring unconditional love, but to cultivate a feeling of non-ill will or non-hatred. This realistic expectation makes the practice more sustainable and less prone to discouragement.

8. Use Metta for Engagement

Practice Metta to foster non-separation from others and to stay engaged with the world, advocating for what is needed from a place of non-hatred. This ‘cleaner burning fuel’ can lead to more effective and sustained action without being passive.

9. Practice Compassion (Karuna) with Feeling

Bring to mind suffering beings or situations and connect with the heart’s natural ’twinge’ of wanting them to be well. You can use phrases like ‘May you be free from suffering’ or simply sit with the raw feeling of compassion.

10. Practice Sympathetic Joy (Mudita)

Bring to mind successful or joyful people and wish for their happiness to continue or increase, even if you initially feel jealousy. This practice can be enhanced by rolling into it from Metta and by visualizing their genuine happiness.

11. Practice Equanimity (Upekka) by Pausing

Cultivate the capacity to ‘stand in the middle of all of this’ by pausing, taking a few breaths, and acknowledging the present moment reality without immediately strategizing or trying to change it. You can use phrases like ‘Right now, it’s like this’ or the mantra ‘Tatra Majatata’.

12. Bear Witness with Equanimity

Practice equanimity by bearing witness to suffering without feeling shame or guilt for not being able to fix everything. Sometimes, simply acknowledging the reality of a difficult situation is a profound act of presence and acceptance.

13. Integrate Generosity into Daily Life

Seek opportunities for generosity in everyday interactions, such as engaging in meaningful conversations with strangers or tipping generously. This fosters connection and a pervasive spirit of giving, impacting your own well-being.

14. Deepen Relationships Through Generosity

Extend generosity to family, partners, and friends by showing more of your heart and offering direct support. This can deepen connections and reduce self-focused behaviors, fostering stronger bonds.

15. Mindfulness Alone Is Not Enough

Understand that while mindfulness (insight practice) is important, it is not a complete solution. Integrate other practices like Metta, generosity, and ethical principles for a more holistic and balanced path to well-being.

16. Accept Gradual, Messy Improvement

Approach meditation as a process of ‘messy, marginal improvement over time’ rather than expecting immediate miracles or grand catharsis. This mindset reduces pressure and encourages consistent, sustainable practice.

17. Cultivate Wholesome Conditions

Engage in practices like service and generosity to help clear and settle the mind, creating helpful conditions that support deeper meditation and insight. These actions contribute to a more receptive state for practice.

18. Avoid Grasping for Peak Experiences

If you intensely ‘want’ a specific peak experience in meditation, this desire can become a barrier to its attainment. Instead, cultivate the practice for its own sake and allow what unfolds to happen naturally.

19. Embrace the Journey of Practice

Recognize that meditation is beneficial at every stage, regardless of whether you achieve ultimate goals, as it is ‘good in the beginning, good in the middle, and good in the end.’ The practice itself provides value throughout your journey.

20. Be With Difficult Feelings Mindfully

Through mindfulness, develop the capacity to simply ‘be with’ difficult feelings like shame, guilt, or fear, observing them without immediately strategizing or turning away. This allows for deeper understanding and acceptance.